Fading Stars FC

Summer 1 2009 Game 8 FSFC 7 SA Old Boys 1

2009-06-28T16:03:00.005-05:00

Schertz Soccer Complex Field No. 12 6.28.09

9:00 a.m. SA Old School vs Fading Stars

In the pregame meeting with Gary, he announces that this is a new/old team that is just starting- #19 thanks Gary for the cupcake as things have been rough
FSFC roll out a makeshift lineup with 6 idiots still putting on their boots- Old School runs out 9 plus a goalie- 10 if you count the really fat guy
Once things settle in it becomes apparent that Old Skool is going to run a trap all the way up to midfield- not the best idea when playing without a left hb
Section 1 for Jacobs and Darilek: 6 offsides later the FSFC break thru and #19 gets 1v1 with the keeper who slides at #19 who plays the ball wide, jumps and the keeper grabs his ankle- #19 keeps going and by the time he gets the ball he bodo'd his angle to shoot- #19 drops it to a wide open Jihad who misses the shot
FSFC keep pressing and eventually the ball ends up on the boot of CRex who shoots, gets it blocked, recovers the ball, knocks it around, then finally CHIPS a left footer into the upper 90 1-0 FSFC
Old School keep pressing offensively and really aren't paying much attention to defense-
Section 2 for Jacobs and Darilek - FSFC win a corner in the box- #19 chases the ball 40 yards onto the other field and is forced to run all the way back to the corner to take the kick. #19 takes a beautiful bending corner- of course the ball was sposed to start bending at the endline and not the 18- anyways Old School easily transitions the ball all the way to the FSFC 18 where they fuck it up- Are you two ass clowns happy?
FSFC keep defending and getting called offsides
Jacobs gets a yellow card for sexually harrasing an old school player
Finally a ball dangerous ball gets played into the box and the keeper chargers it, collides with his own defender and ABobby1, the ball pops loose and is corralled by the sweeper inside the 6, #19 pressures the sweeper who is able to dribble wide of the goal and he clears the ball right into a jumping #19's Ass- Ball takes a sweet carom off of the freshly shaved right butt and it is massed perfectly into the net- ASS GOAL 1 FSFC 1 Old School 0
Halftime FSFC 2 Old School 0
FSFC Make it Rain
Biz gets loose down the right half, beats his last defender and puts a beauty cross into the box- #19 chests the ball down and slots the ball between the charging keeper and defender into the net- FSFC 3 Hangover was funnier 0
ABobby1 gets loose outside the 18, dribbles some folks and unleashes a low cracker that easily beats the keeper 4-0
Biz gets loose down the right half again, beats his defender and crosses only this time his cross is a low spinner that somehow finds its way an inch inside the post 5-0
Old School play the kickoff deep to their forward who easily beats 3 defenders and a lethargic keeper 5-1
Bergman decides to get into the goal fray and starts pushing up from the sweeper spot- Awhite plays a ball to Bergman who takes it deep in the box and lays the ball back to the 18 where #19 one times the pass into the netting 6-1
Jacobs starts getting into it with the old school forward that scored- forward fouls the shit out of Jacobs on 50/50 ball- they kiss and make up
Jihad gets sprung- did i mention they were still trapping at midfield? Jihad is ahead of the defender and all that is between him and goal is green dirt and the keeper- Keeper charges and Jihad hits a beauty chip that hits center netting 7-1
Up 7-1 Romo insists that we start practicing getting called offsides some more
Old School counters and Jacob's favorite forward is bringing the ball across the 18- Berryman fouls the shit out of the forward causing him to collapse like a pile of shit the guy grabs the ball with his hands and Jacobs decides that clearing the ball is the appropriate play- Jacobs kicks the ball while it is in his hands and it finds a nice resting spot on the guys nose-
He gets up pushes Jacobs, does the manly wait for my teamates to grab me before talking shit move- Both get yellow cards and Jacobs gets a red card up 7-1
FINAL FSFC 7 SA Old School 1

Lineup

GK Ken Blische
FB Bergman
FB Berryman
ST/SW Darilek
CM CRex
CM ABobby1
HB Bobby2
HB Biz
F #19
F Jihad

Bench
Jacobs
Berardo
AWhite
Romo
Kneals

Goals: #19 3(6) ABobby1 1(1) CRex 1(1) Jihad 1(2) Biz 1(2)
Assts: Biz 2(3) AWhite 1(1) Bergman 1(1)
GAllowed: Ken Blische 1(11)

Cards
Yellow Pills Jacobs 1(1)
Red Pills: Jacobs 1(1)

Awards n Shit

This is much easier to write after a win
The offense woke up- about fucking time

Offensive MVP: Biz- 2 Assists and a cross/goal
Defensive MVP: Berryman for getting Jacobs tossed
Tackle of the Game: Berryman- the dirty slide tackle that led to the ejection of Jacobs
Goal of the Game: The ASS GOAL- GAME WINNER
Goat of the Game: #19 for the Beasley like corner that damn near led to a goal
Pussy of the Game: Bobby2- a pink fucking chair to sit in? next thing you know you are gonna be rooting for that fag school in Austin while wearing your PETA shirt and petting your My Little Pony doll
Asshole of the Game: Jacobs- how the fuck do you get tossed from a game up 7-1?

Goals
#19 3(6) Alex 1(1) Cblische 1(1) Jihad 1(2) Biz 1(2)
Assts: Biz 2(3) AWhite 1(1) Bergman 1(1)

Summer 1 2009 FSFC 1 Military FC 3

2009-06-23T12:05:00.001-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 9 6.21.09

9:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Military FC

For the first time in a long time the FSFC have 13 people at the pitch for the kickoff- helps that the game was delayed 6 minutes for the Military boys- Game starts 9 v 11
#19 plays the opening tap to Romo, Romo passes to Bobby1, Bobby 1 dribbles two defenders plays a thru ball to #19 who runs it down inside the 18 and rips a wicked toe poke that catches the keeper napping 1-0 - 19 seconds in
Game settles down after that- FSFC fail to put the hammer down as the ball spends too much time on the outside halfs
Military FC bring on their full load of players and the game is pretty even, however the FSFC offense is still stuck in the season long sputter as several people still don't understand the offsides rule
Glass Darilek goes out with another boo boo and the middle of the defense collapses- Military play a cross to the top of the 18 to the wide open CM who turns and shoots giving Ken zero chance at the side netter 1-1
Minutes before halftime the Military HB plays a sky ball to FSFC 35, Jacobs mistimes his jump, the ball lands at the feet of the forward who takes off on a breakaway- Ken is unable to get down on the shot and the game is now 2-1 Military
Halftime
FSFC take control of possesion and work the ball effectively around the pitch- Big weakness in the defense on the Military right side as the HB refused to cross midfield-
Bobby2 starts to exploit this winning multiple balls eventually Bobby2 gets off a beauty cross to #19 at the 12 who puts the bounding cross on target but without enough cayanned giviing the an easy save
Jihad gets loose down the left side of the box and is 1v1 with the keeper- his shot goes so wide that Bobby1 tries to run the ball down but can't and its a throw in
Awhite takes over for Bobby2 on the right half and continues the onslaught- Awhite crosses to #19 at the top of the box who sends a ball into the box where Bobby1 and Bodo fight over the loose ball with Bodo winning the ball and getting off a shot that the keeper gets a finger tip on and the ball misses by 2 inches
Down 2-1 with about 15 minutes left, FSFC win a corner from the left side- Berardo, playing Left FB decides to take the kick leaving only Darilek and Tommy back at midfield- 9 men pushed up and you can guess the result
Berardos corner is played high and too far out and is easily cleared by Military defender who plays it to midfield and the race is on- The entire left side of the pitch is vacant except for 2 Military players and a 5 v 1 situation ends in the third goal 3-1
FSFC try to comeback, AWhite gets loose again down the right side, passes to #19 who passes to a wide open Bobby1 inside the 18- Bobby1's first touch is too rough and he is forced to settle the ball down before shooting wide of the net
All she wrote
FSFC 1 Military FC 3

Lineup Bench

GK Ken Bodo
FB Berardo AWhite
FB Bergman Tommy
SW Jacobs
ST Darilek
HB Bobby2
HB Jihad
CM Kneals
CM Bobby1
F #19
F Romo

Goals #19 1(3)
Assts Bobby1 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 3(10)

Cards- None Fucking Amazing to have an English speaking ref

Awards n Shit

Offensive MVP: Bobby1and Bobby2
Defensive MVP: Jacobs- but not by much
Quote of the Game: Ken- During the halftime dance contest- something about dancing a Jig and the other team
Goat of the Game: Bodo- showing up right at 9 and forgetting your boots
Goal of the Game: Toe Poker
Tackle of the Game: Berardo and his spinning crane kick

Summer 1 2009 Vids y Mas 6

2009-06-18T15:30:00.004-05:00

Dear Abby,

So this chick with long legs and a sweet round ass walks in to the restaurant yesterday (sounds like the beginning of a joke)and of course I had to check to make sure her food was okay. She turned out to be Puerto Rican and a stripper at an all nude place in Austin. Needless to say I invited her out for drinks later. Being the classy guy that I am I had her meet me at Fiasco's for some beer 'n tequila. (Closer to the casa than Waldo's) After feeding her a couple of shots I was getting tired of her constant babbling but did I mention the sweet Peurto Rican ASS! Back to my place we went and down to business. She even carried on a conversation while getting stuck from behind! Amazing! Somewhere during the night I rolled over on my nice king size bed to pass out as she was still babbling when out came the quote of the night that made me feel like I had picked up a Hooter's girl. Just as I was almost out I heard, "Did this use to be a waterbed?" Yes I was too tired to start the "What the fuck are you talking about?" conversation. Since sticking her again in the morning and sending her on her merry way I have been perplexed by that question and am wondering if there is some type of conversion kit that I am not aware of or if she was truly, let's say Hooter's minded. Any insight would be greatly appreciated.
signed,
Disease Free in Saytown

The state of US Soccer

This doosh needs to turn in the #19 kit

Dear Casey Kasem, I have a white friend that needs inpiration, please play Caucasian for Romo

Summer 1 2009 FSFC 3 Los Bomberos 3

2009-06-15T11:57:00.000-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 15 6.14.09

9:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Los Bomberos

FSFC start the adventure with 6 field players for a good 10 minutes and don't even give up a shot
Bobby2 saunters to the field, puts on his tennis shoes and makes 7
AWhite and Bodo arrive smelling of cheap booze and robster craws giving us 9
FSFC get the first shot of the game as Bobby2 gets loose on a long ball and misses wide by inches
Still no shots for the Los Bomberos when TRex finally gets to the pitch
Now we can play- TRex settles a ball at the 18 and hits a crack that the keeper dives to save,
Jihad corrals the rebound and shoots it on frame, cleared by the defender right to Bodo who tucks the loose ball inside the post 1-0
FSFC have done the impossible leading at halftime after playing short for 25+ minutes
Halftime 1-0
2nd half and no subs, but hey we have 11- Things are under control defensively as the Bomberos can't do shit
Handball is ruled at midfield giving the FSFC a free kick- Berardo chips a thru ball over the offsides trap and TRex runs on to the ball and has a straight line to the keeper- for once TRex doesn't fuck it up and buries his shot 2-0.
The game is on cruise control, Trex starts taking players to dribbling school and misses by inches on a nice shot- game is over as the Bomberos still have zero scoring chances... and the the fun begins
#19 is called for a foul on a 50/50 ball in the air- The player #19 fouled , The Twat, decides to start talking shit and puts his finger in #19's face
#19 knocks the Twats hand down and the Twat kicks #19- Referee runs over gives the Twat a pink card then gives #19 a pink card for getting kicked-
Down to 9 field players and the defense falls apart-
Bomberos get a deep throw in that makes its way into the box where it skims off of Kblische's leg and past Ken for a goal 2-1
2 minutes later the Bomberos get a corner kick and somehow they manage to ping pong the ball into the net 2-2
5 minutes later, the Bomberos take the ball down the left side, cross to the middle where Berryman intercepts and clears the ball 4 yards and right to a Bombero player- who takes out a pen and paper writes Berryman a thank you note as he taps the ball in the net 2-3
Last minute of the game and Kblische goes on a dribbling rampage and eventually draws a foul jsut outside the 18
Kblische covered in nervous sweat linesup the his potential game saving shot resting on size 7 Ronaldihno replica shoes-
Kblische hits his shot right into the fucking wall- game over thanks for nothing
But wait theres more, order now and you we will throw in the ball rebounding right to Kblische who pops a floater at the goal that drifts like a monarch butterfly searching for a place to die and gently landing in the side netting- 3-3
Final FSFC 3 Los Bomberos 3

Goals: Bodo 1(1) Trex 1(2) Kblische 1(3)
Assists: Berardo 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 3(7)

Red Pills: #19 1(1)
Yellow Pills: AWhite 1(1)

AWARDS and Shit

Starting with 6 and ending with 8 (Tommy got hurted) 3-3 ain't a bad result
Offensive MVP- Trex- the dribbling clinic was nice
Defensive MVP- Kblische- despite the own goal playing short ain't fun
Pussy of the Game- Darilek- its my birthday I don't want to play
Goat of the Game- #19 getting kicked and tossed spoiled the party
Goal of the Game- Kblische and his well planned free kick

Linuep

GK Ken
ST/SW Kblische
FB Tommy
FB Berryman
CM Jihad
CM Berardo
CM #19

Bench
Bobby2
AWhite
Bodo
TRex

Summer 2009 Vids y Mas 4

2009-06-11T14:26:00.002-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 15 6.14.09

9:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Los Bomberos

Summer 1 2009 Game 5 FSFC 3 Medina Utd 4

2009-06-09T17:01:00.005-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 15 6.7.09

4:00 p.m. Fading Stars vs Medina United FC

Per the outstanding attendance and performance all of games will be played at 4 pm from here on out
First 20 minutes the game is played exclusively on the left half of the field and the ball is kicked out of bounds 46 times
Water Break- yay
After the water break a refreshed Romo makes a nice trap and shimmey shake and plays the ball to #19 who easily beats the sweeper and heads inside the 18 where a charging keeper is no match for #19's power shot that makes Lance's PKs look like a changeup 1-0
Did I mention the 3rd string goalkeeper, Biz, yet? b/c he just might be the main character in this yarn
FSFC defense makes the mistake of pulling a trap and getting the offsides call. Biz lines up to take the free kick and hits a 1 hopper a whopping 20 yards to a wide open opposing player who makes an easy trap and shoots at the open goal. Biz scrambles to get the shot and punches it right into the upper 90 1-1
Multiple opportunities arise with closing the rate of Berryman's only pick up line- Julio misses a wide open header off a beautiful cross- Heading to half tied at 1
2nd Half and Kendall loses the battle for last on the field as Bodo once again tried his sneak on the field bullshit
Kblische gets the ball in the middle and tries to run the play that always works dumping the ball to #19 and getting the return pass- Kblische choofs the pass but #19 is able to recover and slot a thru ball to a wide open Kblische who shoots a skipper from the top of the 18 that beats the keeper 2-1
More goalie fun as Medina play a cross into the box that Biz gets a foot on and the ball spins backwards to an offsides Medina player that taps in the goal. Cluster fuck goals 2 FSFC 2
Julio gets loose on a flick from #19 chips the keeper and the ball is on target for the middle of the goal. The ball takes a wicked bounce clearing the post by a good 5 feet
Kblische takes a free kick from the FSFC 35 and the Medina midfielders are running a trap at midfield- Kblische hits Julio perfectly and he goes 1v1 with the keeper, the keeper gets a foot on the ball but Julio is able to recover and walk the ball into the net 3-2
Shitty Goal #3- Ball gets crossed into the box, Kneals calls for the ball to clear- Bergman keeps running at the ball and Kneals hits the clear and Bergman once again manages to get his hand on the ball in the box- PK good 3-3
Romo gets his head on a corner and manages to hit it right to the keeper- Medina counters and a guy shoots from 25 yards that is deflected by AWhite and the ball ends up upper 90 past the Biz 4-3 FINAl

Awards and Shit

Offensive MVP- Jihad- dominated the left half in the 2nd half of the game
Defensive MVP- Hard to give when you give up 4 but Darilek wins out of pity
BeerVP- Kneals- almost lost it by leaving the beer in the car until after the game
Goat of the Game- BIZ- Giving it to the Biz gives me great pleasure and sadness all at the same time just like sneaking the pinkie while watching HBO's acclaimed series Cathouse

Lineup

GK Biz
FB Bergman
FB Berryman
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
HB Jihad
HB Bobby2
CM Julio
CM Kneals
F #19
F Kblische

Bench
Tommy
Awhite
TRex
Romo

Summer 1 2009 Game 4 FSFC vs Rangers FC

2009-06-04T10:10:00.002-05:00

Schertz Soccer Complex Field No. 12 5.31.09

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Rangers FC

Things look good as purple clad Opie is in the net
Bodo is intimidated by the girl playing fullback
Rangers are short players and Carlos sends over a 6'3 black guy to play striker for the Rangers which arouses Jacobs
Game is ugly as the FSFC control the ball but struggle with that offsides thing
Ball gets played towards right FB Berryman who makes a valiant effort to play the ball after tripping on his own feet- Forward ends up on a breakaway that Ken comes out gets the ball then as usual tackles the forward- no penalty for once
#19 gathers a loose ball and hits a cross to Biz inside the 18- Biz brings the ball down, barely beats the 5'3 girl and passes to Jihad at the 12 who tucks the ball around the Purple keeper eater and just inside the post- FSFC 1 Rangers 0
This is Jihads first goal in 10 months 3 days or a total of 307 days and 35 games- that is a hell of an accomplishment if it measuring JP and sobriety
More offsides, more Romo yelling to play horizontal- Bodo gets loose 1v1 and Opie makes an easy save
Halftime 1-0
FSFC play with better possesion as the Rangers have all but given up any hope of beating the wall of Jacobs and Darilek
Julio goes 1v1 with the girl FB and she stuffs his ass then wags her finger in his face like Dikembe Moutumbo
Transition time as Jacobs gets a loose one in the FS box, plays a ball down the sideline that #19 saves from going out and hits Trex just past midfield. Trex takes on the defender then brings the ball into the box, and performs a perfect Bodo dribble off of the sweeper and back to his feet- Low shot near post beats Opie with ease. 2-0
Nothing else happens of consequence
Much needed victory but the offense still sucks

Goals: Jihad 1(1) Trex 1(1)
Assts: Biz 1(1) #19 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 0(4)
Cards: None

Offensive MVP: Jihad- 307 days without scoring- Berryman doesn't go that long between hookers
Defensive MVP: Jacobs- Ken had an easy day and Darileks ego can't handle this award
Goal of the Game: Jihad 10 months 3 days is a jail sentence for indecent exposure
WTF of the Game: Check out Bobby1 in this picture- Moobs on a skinny guy?
Quote of the Game: Biz- when 10 cars leave the fields causing a dust storm with 10 yards of visibility- "At least Jihad won't have trouble driving in this shit"

Lineup
GK Ken
FB Berryman
FB Bergman
SW Jacobs
ST Darilek
HB Biz
HB Jihad
CM Julio
CM Romo
F #19
F Bodo

Bench
Bobby2
Bobby1
Trex
Berardo

Summer 1 2009 Links y Mas 3

2009-05-28T20:51:00.005-05:00

Nasty Headbutt

More proof that baseball players prefer balls

Maggots Michael, You're eating Maggots.

FSFC are implementing a new FNG initiation practice

Summer 2009 Vids y Mas 2

2009-05-15T10:53:00.005-05:00

Blades Secret weapon is a wizard

Naked Wizard Tased By Reality from Tracy Anderson on Vimeo.

A certain Blades players will be performing at halftime

Kendall submits his new favorite movie

Darilek works on gun safety

$50 says Ken gives up a goal just like this

Cinco de Mayo 2009 Summary

2009-05-05T09:34:00.010-05:00

12 Steps to Ending the Bridesmaid Tradition

Step 1 - We admit we were powerless over our addiction to 2nd place - that our games had become unmanageable and that drinking 3 Kegs and 120lbs of mudbugs is ok
Step 2 - Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity- next year we will have better drugs and a massage therapist
Step 3 - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of MigJet as we understood MigJet- this means Hooters, El Jarro and trists with employees
Step 4 - Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves- some of us are old, some slept in, some drank too much, some abandoned the team for the finals.
Step 5 - Admitted to #19, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs- missed breakaways, missed PK, weak shots, brilliant shots hitting posts, shots from Lance missing by inches, a psychotic goal keeper.
Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character- nah I like you fuckers the way you are
Step 7 - Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings- don't think God can help us here
Step 8 - Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all- this one is directed at Paul for telling a kid he has cum all over his face
Step 9 - Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others- Fuck em- pain is good to inflict
Step 10 - Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it- fuck this one too
Step 11 - Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out- still don't think God can help us
Step 12 - Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs- More beer, more mudbugs and more football

Game 1 FSFC 2 vs SASA Aztecas 2
Specht 11 @ 9:30

late arrivals make the lineup easy-
thoroughly enjoyed the Azteca dooshbag doing Tai Chi to warm up for the game
we give up the first goal on a counter attack that a rusty unit wasn't ready to defend and the FSFC find themselves down 1-0 early on
FSFC get a free kick that Kendall hammers from midfield, #19 chests the ball down inside the 18 and lays it off to Kblische who mishits his shot so bad the keeper dives the wrong to the far post and the ball rolls into the middle of the net 1-1 halftime
Halftime adjustments are made and the FSFC start kicking the shit out of the pretty boys-
Lance gets loose inside the 18 and crosses over the middle to a wide open Pblische who brings the ball down and scorches a shot into the side netting 2-1
10 minutes left and the game is under control- FSFC earn a PK to put the game away and coach Charlie Weiss decides to leave it up to his star QB Jimmy "Paul" Clausen to put the game on ice.
Keeper dives to his right, ball goes to the keepers left and keeps going past the post and into the parking lot.
Fuck you Charlie Weiss even the rubber band in your stomach hates you- all future PK's will be taken by uber muscular pretty boy Brady Quinn
Under 3 minutes left and 1 last gasp for the Aztecas- Kblische decides to double team the ball and the offensive player pass splits Kblische and Ryan to a wide open player. Darilek makes a stab but gets beaten and the guy shoots from an impossible angle and roofs it 2-2
Final FSFC 2 Aztecas 2 1 Point and a 2 points lost

Goals- Kblische 1(1) Pblische 1(1)
Assts- #19 1(1) Pablo 1(1)
Allowed- Ken 2

Game 2 FSFC 2 vs HFC International 1
Specht 11 @ 12:30

Houston teams are the best at crying
FSFC get on the board after #19 draws a foul outsid the right edge of the 18. Paul plays a beauty chip to the far post that Lance heads in. Amazingly Lance was left wide open or was it the pull block of the guard Kendall that did that. 1-0
Late in the half TRex gets loose from midfield chasing the ball like it was a wounded triceratops- Trex makes a nice cut and finds Lance who brings down the high pass, gets whacked but still hits rips his shot off the crossbar, off the field number and straight down 2-0 Halftime
2nd half, the Houston team comes out with a vengeance and pushes the pace of play
They eventually score on Ken- don't remember and the FSFC hold on for a 2-1 win
2 GAME 4 points tied for 1st

Goals: Lance 2(2)
Assts: Pablo 1(2)
Allowed: Ken 1(3)

Game 3 FSFC 2 vs CSHA Entrix Guvners 1
Specht 10 @ 3:30

Win or a tie and the FSFC advance to Sunday
Lance decides to sit this one out with a bum ankle and let the more talented players handle this one
FSFC seem relaxed so much so that there is zero talking on the pitch
First great scoring opportunity goes to the FSFC as Paul hits a beautiful corner that finds a wide open #19 on the back post- the ball was so beautiful #19 decided that the best way to score was to nose the ball towards the goal then catch it. Apparently that is against the rules or something
Inspired by his brilliant heading display #19 decides that the first one was too easy and a more difficult opportunity is all that is needed
Minutes before halftime the ball is skied in the air at about the 18 keeper runs out calling for the ball- #19 levitates over the taller defender and the oncoming keeper and using the nose on the top of his head gets the ball rolling towards the empty net eventually finding its way into the goal It was a dream come true as #19 hasn't had that much hang time since dominating Double Dribble
1-0 Halftime
Multiple chances are missed by the FSFC to put this one away- Paul lets loose on a shot from 25 that destroys the post
#19 and Hunter get thrown off the pitch for a wee bit of shit talking with the "sweeper"
Guvner forward gets the ball at the 18, turns on Kendall and rips it thru his 5 hole and beats Ken for the goal 1-1
Minutes later they ring the post and almost take the lead
Tied with under 10 minutes left, Berardo tapes up Lance and 30 seconds into his playing time he hits a header off the post
Bobby1 gets loose 1v1 vs the last defender and plays the ball around him and the defender bats the ball down with his hand. PK awarded
Brady Quinn er Lance steps up to the spot and hammers a fucking 95mph blast just right of center that the keeper never sees
2-1 Final
Day 1 complete 2-0-1 7 points and moving on

Goals: #19 1(1) Lance 1(3)
Allowed: Ken 1(4)

6th annual Mudbug Massacre:
Party gets off to a disaterous start as 6 oclock hits and the first guests arrive. No kegs, no mudbugs, no wings. Migjet brings a date and boy is she impressed by the kick ass party.

7:00 and the mudbugs and beer finally arrive, but no taps or cups or ice- Hey AWhite, those might be things that would help

9:00 party is full on and the beer is flowing, the bugs are dying and FnJ is rolling.
10:00 Barnes fishes the live mudbug out of the pool and Kendall and Nate offer him $20 to eat it
10:01 Barnes rips the mudbug in half and eats it
10:05 Berryman eats a live one for free
12:00 FnJ still rolling and I will give anyone $50 that can tell me who got the first red card in Churchill history
2:00 Tirres, Paul, Barnes and FnJ are all that standing
2:05 Barnes takes a shower in the pool

120 lbs of Mudbugs
2 1/2 Kegs
Romo's cornbread
Wings
Done!

Game 4 Semi Finals FSFC 3 vs DSG Lazio 2
Specht 12 10:30

Warmups consist of the FSFC standing around with no opponent
Tirres is thought to be in the pokey
KBlische chases down a loose ball that the keeper drops, then gets tackled by the keeper for the easy PK call
Lance steps up to the spot and once again hits a ball that the keeper never sees 1-0
1-1 Halftime don't remember how they scored
Kblische draws another PK as he flips the ball up while on the endline and it is allegedly batted down by the sweeper.
Lance hits this PK on the ground- the keeper dove the right way only problem was the ball was in the net before the keeper even hit the ground 2-1
Minutes later the ball gets loose in the FSFC penalty area and instead of playing the ball, Ken tackles Ryan and forward- Ken gets a nice yellow card and big slice of humble pie when the PK whizzes past him for the tie game 2-2
Pblische lends the FS Sean for 10 minutes and it pays off- Ball gets played in deep in the box, #19 goes up for the header and is wiped out by the keeper who punches the ball out what should have been danger. Sean hits a 40 yard shot that has the keeper scrambling back but he has no shot as the ball lands safely in the net- Game Winner
FSFC 3 DSG Lazio 2- Finals a cuming

Goals: Lance 2(5) Sean 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 2(6)

Game 5 Finals FSFC 1 vs Dallas ACME 3
Specht 12 @ 2:30

Dead Legs, cramps, exhaustion is the great reward for making the finals
Darilek skips the finals b/c his wife wears the pants
Average opponent except they are 20 and under and can run all day
ACME gets on the board after Ken makes a nice save, Kendall is unable to clear the ball and #9 for the opposing team hits a shot that Nate tries to stop but can't 0-1
Plenty of opportunities to tie the game, but the equalizer doesn't come until Tirres hits a top shelf free kick that the keeper saves, rebound lands at the 6 where Biz heads it in 1-1
Mauricio hits a shot that the keeper makes a diving save on
Maurciio hits a shot that the keeper makes a save on rebound goes to #19 who lays it off to a wide open Paul who choofs his shot
1-1 Halftime but the legs are dead
Acme gets on the board again when #9 easily beats 2 defenders and crosses the ball far post and it is tapped in 1-2
FSFC squander multiple good chances- Lance hits a cracker from midfield that beats the keeper but goes wide by a foot- etc etc
Did I mention Dead Legs have set in?
Acme player hits a shot that Ryan gets a head on, but the ball takes an unfortunate route and floats over Ken's head 3-1
FSFC don't have the energy or luck to get back in this one
Final Acme 3 FSFC 1

Goals: Biz 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 3(9)

Tourney Awards:

Offensive MVP: Captain PK Lance- Missed 6 shots by a total of 2 feet- The 3 PK's he took would have broken the keepers hand if he actually saw them before they hit the net
Defensive MVP: Nate- pretty sure he played every minute at sweep
Goal of the Tourney: Sean's Semi Final Game winner
Pussy of the Tourney: Darileck- skipping the finals b/c you don't wear the pants in the family
Goat of the Tourney- Paul with the missed PK that made us all tired
Churchill Post of the Tourney: Paul- 35 yard crack in game 3 that rung the left cross bar and went out of bounds for a throw in on the right side of the pitch. The post is still ringing
Quote of the Tourney #1: Kneal's 9 year old ballboy ragging on Ken after the third game- "So you gave up 4 goals?"
Quote of the Tourney #2: Kendall "My Cramps have cramps"
Quote of the Tourney #3: Paul " you have cum all over your face" directed at the 20 year old that was a little overzealous with the sunscreen application
Tackle of the Tourney: ?
Jackass of the Tourney: Berryman- flaunting his Coed medal that he piggy backed his way to winning while we are playing the actual Championship game and then fucking up the Him Toast for the 50th consecutive time
Foul of the Tourney: Ryan Payne- Game 3 loose ball on at midfield Ryan stops the counter attack and destroys the player
Fat Man in a little Shirt: Berryman- when Mauricio borrowed his jersey it looked like week 17 on the Biggest Loser
Jackass of the tourney- Ken for the tackle of Ryan and the offensive player giving up the semi final game tying PK
2009 Mudbug Champion: UNKNOWN
2009 Drunken Asshole: FnJ - Must have told the Churchill Red Card story 20 times, the started in the bar business story 15 times and telling Tirres "you could only wish you had great hair like mine at 44"

Cinco De Mayo 2009 Preview

2009-04-27T11:49:00.013-05:00

Cinco de Mayo Theme song 2009
(pretend the blind lady is a Mudbug)

Schedule

Saturday May 2nd 2009

Specht 11 @9:30 SASA Azteca - 0-1-0 Lost 2-0

Specht 11 @12:30 HFA International Jihad's people

Specht 10 @3:30 vs CSAH Entrix Guvners no fucking clue

6th Annual MudBug Massacre 6:00-?

100lbs of juicy Mudbugs
40lbs of sublime daytona Wings
3 Kegs of luscious beer

Sunday May 3rd 2009

Semifinal

Specht 12 @ 10:30

Final
Specht 13 @ 2:30

2009 AWARDS Up for grabs (defending champion)

Offensive MVP (Lance/Paul)
Defensive MVP (Nate)
Goal of the Tourney(#19)
Pussy of the Tourney (Pblische)
Churchill Post (Lance)
Quote of the Tourney (Nate/Kendall's puking)
Tackle of the Tourney
Foul of the Tourney (Kendall)
Fat Man in a little Shirt (Barnes)
Jackass of the Tourney (Tom for bringing a nagging date to the party)
2009 Mudbug Champion (#19's 12 Year old Nephew)
2009 Drunken Asshole (MigJet still holding on to his 2007 Title)

FADING STARS Cinco Results 7-9-2

2008 Cinco 4-1

Game 1 3-1 vs SASA Anteaters
Game 2 6-0 vs NTPSA Guiness
Game 3 3-0 vs HFA Kingwood

Semi- 4-2 vs SASA Rayados
Finals 1-3 vs HFA Moya

2007 Cinco 2-2-0

Game 1 3-1 vs HFA CG International
Game 2 4-1 vs SASA Medina United
Game 3 0-3 vs SASA Fubar

Semifinals: 0-1 vs SASA Fubar (later disqualified b/c their entry fee check bounced)

2006 Cinco 0-3-0

Game 1 Lost 2-1 vs Houston team
Game 2 Lost 3-0 and they hit 3 posts
Game 3 Forfeit

2005 Cinco de Mayo 1-1-1

Game 1 Tie Blades 2-2
Game 2 Win vs Houston team 1-0
Game 3 Loss vs Dallas team 2-0 Big brawl almost breaks out after the game

2004 Cinco de Mayo 0-2-1

Game 1 Tie Global Stars 2-2
Game 2 Loss Houston Celtics 2-0
Game 3 Forfeit

Summer 1 2009 Game 1 Intl Old Boys 4 FSFC 2

2009-04-06T13:10:00.006-05:00

Editors Note* We here at the FSFC have obtained exclusive content and after consulting with the world renowned firm of Berardo, Lilly, Jacobs and Woodard LLC, we bring you a medical first, the successful transgender implant of an oriental vagina onto a leg.

Schertz Soccer Complex Field No. 9 4.5.09

9:00 a.m. Int'l Old Boys FC vs Fading Stars

Game Summary

1st play of the game summarizes the game- Kblische taps the kickoff to #19 who turns and passes a rolling ball back to Bergman who completely whiffs the trap and it rolls out of bounds for a deep throw in
FSFC when not turning the ball over are getting plenty of oppt to score but failing
Intl get a steal from the FSFC backline- make 1 pass and are score FSFC 0 Intl 1
FSFC come back and Pblische misses a shot wide-
FSFC turn the ball over again and Intl scores again 2-0
Ken makes an easy save and punts the ball and the wind carries it 10 yards out of bounds to a chasing Kblische- Kblische hits the cemented bench, slips and flips over the metal benches-
this is what it looked like
Kblische is bestowed the great honor of being carried off the field and driven to the hospital by his ultra pregnant Sister in Law- rumour has it Pblische is naming the child Flip
Once play resumes, the FSFC make it a game again as Biz and Bobby1 combine to steal the ball off the endline and get the ball to Berryman at the 18- Berryman plays a ball to Pblische who rips a shot over the diving keeper- FSFC 1 Intl 2 Halftime
Coach Mig makes some adjustments to the lineup to counter the speed of the Intl forward- Trex and Julio Iglesias start the half at FB
Strategy works as the FSFC gain control of the game but still can't finish with at least 10 opportunities- KBlische rips a shot that the keeper saves; after corner kick leads to a flurry in front of the goal the ball pops to a wide open Jihad at the 8 who misses high and right.
under 10 minutes left and Ken hits a goal kick to Kendall who misses the trap and the ball goes right to the Intl forward leading to a 2v1 break that Intl scores easily on 3-1
30 seconds later and the FSFC turn it over in again leading to another breakaway that Ken gets a hand on but can't save 4-1
2 minutes left and Biz gets a free kick from 35 yards out that is ripped an inch inside the post for a very nice goal 4-2
Final FSFC 2 Intl Old Boys 4

Goals: Pblische 1(1) Biz 1(1)
Assts: Berryman 1(1)
Allwd: Ken 4(4)

School House Rocks and Awards

Goat of the Game: Ken- you are only supposed to hurt the other team not Kblische

Goal of the Game: Biz- free kick goals are always winners

Defensive MVP: 4 goals not sure you can have an MVP

Offensive MVP: Migjet- only one that didn't screw up

Jackass of the Game: Kblische- looked like Johhny Knoxville hisself flipping over the bench

Quote of the Game: The collective "Oh Shit" while Kblische is flipping over the bench and splitting his leg open down to the bone

Lineup
GK Ken
FB Berryman
FB Bergman
SW Kendall
ST Darilect
HB Jihad
HB Berardo
CM Pblische
CM Bobby1
F #19
F Kblische

Bench
Coach Migjet
Bobby2
Fireman Sam
TRex
Julio Iglesias
FnJ
Romo

Summer 1 2009 Vids y Mas 1 "Kendall's Vids"

2009-04-03T13:01:00.002-05:00

I am not gay so I don't know what this is

How to get laid at Spring Training

God save us, the Dems are in charge

I am not gay so I do know what this is, please open this at work b/c i need your job

Spring 2009 Game 10 FSFC 2 Traditionals 1

2009-03-23T21:29:00.007-05:00

NEYSO Specht Road Soccer Complex No. 10
9:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Traditionals

Game Summary

Pretty sure we have played these guys before under a better team name
Kblische is late to the game as he has to wait for a fat guy to finish shitting so he can venture into the port-a-can to revel in the smell of freshly shat chorizo and egg tacos with a jagermeister chaser while depositing his refuse
Sitting on a 180 plus minute scoreless streak, the FSFC decide to go uphill with the wind
Things are better as the ball is worked around the pitch and finally Romo plays a ball to #19 who easily beats the keeper- except for that idiotic offsides rule the drought would have ended
Play is even- Jacobs makes some runs from FB that almost turn out well-
#19 gets a yellow card for getting tackled by the keeper
Kneals gets a loose ball from 30 yards out and unleashes a cracker that beats the keeper but not the crossbar
15 seconds left and the traditionals get a counter attack- Double Dave slips on a banana and the the forward gets in alone vs Ken and beats him low
Halftime FSFC 0 Traditionals 1
Scoreless streak tops 225 minutes
FSFC playing into the wind look much better- Kblische channels his brother and starts dribbling defenders beating 3 players gets fouled outside the box, keeps going with the ball and gets arm tackled in the box. Ref awards a free kick outside the 18 that Kblische puts on frame but the keeper saves
Unfazed, Kblische dribbles 3 more players and puts his shot wide of the post
Finally some clarity- ball gets chipped into the box to #19 who tries to trap the ball and gets leveled from behind- PK is awarded. Darilek asks #19 if he is going to take the PK and gets this "Are you fucking kidding me?" Darilek takes the PK and beats the keeper top shelf FSFC 1 Traditionals 1 Scoreless streak ends at about 250 minutes
Traditionals get a player tossed for a stupid foul on Kneals.
FSFC control the game giving up zero shots in the 2nd half
10 minutes left and Berryman gets the ball down the right side and crosses to Romo at the top of the key. Romo sends a bounce pass deep in the paint to BizMarkie. BizMarkie posts up the defender at the 6. What transgresses would have changed the NBA forever. Imagine Oliver Pig Miller mastering Hakeem's Dream Shake- Biz fakes left, fakes right, goes left again then spins right and fires a blast near post that the keeper never sees
FSFC 2 Traditionals 1
FSFC pass the ball around for the final minutes and actually win
FINAL FSFC 2 Traditionals 1

Goals: Darilek 1(1) Biz 1(4)
Assts: Romo 1(4)
Allowd: Ken 1(17)

Yellow: #19 1(4)

Offensive MVP: Kblische- no goals but gosh darn he tried

Defensive MVP: Kendall- not sure who he blew to get 5th road seats to the spurs, but he must be excellent

Tackle of the Game: Kendall with the slide tackle on the forward- forward starts screaming about how he didn't get any ball- meanwhile Kendall has the ball on his foot and gets up dribbling

Goat of the Game: Kenny Powers- weak ball is played forward and Ken runs over to pick up the ball, falls down hurts his hand, and has to kick it out of bounds- pretty damn funny

Goal of the Game: Pig Miller's dream shake

Quote of the Game: Traditionals defender against Biz- "I did everything I could, but he is 6 inches taller outweighs me by 50lbs"- ultimate ownage by the Biz

Scoundrel of the Game: Jacobs- trying to commit #19 to Laurel Ridge so he can pick up the referral bonus

Lineup

GK Kenny Powers
FB Bergman
FB Jacobs
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
HB Bobby2
HB Berryman
CM Kneals
CM Romo
F #19
F Jihad

Bench
Kblische
BizMarkie
Double Dave

Spring 2009 SEASON RESULTS

5-4-1 16 points

17 Goals For
20 Goals Allowed 3 Shutouts

Goldish Boot

#19 5
Biz 4
Kblische 3

Points Leaders G-A-T

#19 5-1-11
Biz 4-0-8
Bobby1 2-4-8

Yellow Card Winner

#19 4
Jacobs 2
Ken 2 should have been 10

Goalie Stats

Berryman 3-0 3 allowed 1 shutout
Ken 2-4-1 17 allowed 2 shutouts

Hack of the Spring

Ken
Bobby2
Double Dave

My Child has perfect attendance bumper sticker

#19 10 games
Berryman/Jihad/Kblische/Biz/Bergman 9 Games

Spring 2009 Vids y Mas 10 Finale

2009-03-18T16:43:00.003-05:00

A tribute to my hero Kenny Fucking Powers

Spring 2009 Vids y Mas 7

2009-03-06T10:27:00.002-06:00

Get the squirrel

Change

Shitty Keeping Part 1

Shitty Keeping Part 2

The Return of Prank Wars

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Spring 2009 Game 8 FSFC 0 Purple Haze 3

2009-03-03T23:29:00.005-06:00

FSFC are now 4-4-0
4 losses are the most we have had in a season since Wasson ran off half of the team
Thru 8 games 15 goals for 18 allowed
24 goals scored is the lowest we have had in a 10 game season and we are going to smash that record for futility
22 players on the roster yet average attendance is less than 13
a whopping 2 players have shown up for every game
We lost to the shittiest team we have ever played 3-0

Goals: none
Allowed: Ken 3(16)

Yellows: Jacobs 1(1) Bobby2 1(1)

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Double Dave
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
CM #19
CM Jacobs
HB FnJ
HB Berryman
F BizMarkie
F Bobby2

Bench
Coach Migjet

Spring 2009 Vids y Mas 6

2009-02-27T11:35:00.002-06:00

Mel Gibson's Comeback Role

]

Publishers Clearinghouse

Air Jordan vs David Robinson- Who ya got?

New Workout Video for Kids

Spring 2009 FSFC 4 Los Bomberos 2

2009-02-22T20:45:00.007-06:00

NEYSO Bulverde Rd. Complex Field No. 5 2.22.09 11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Los Bomberos

March 4th 2007 was a significant day for the FSFC as it was Kendalls last goal which coincidentally was the last time he admits to getting laid

Let's take a look at what has happened since his last fornication and goal up until this goal and his alleged sex act

Heath Ledger was not only alive he was spitting on his hand to bang dudes in the mountains
The Spurs won another Championship
Jessica Simpson was skinny with big tits now she is Kendall's type fat with saggy tits
Ken wasn't playing soccer and thus not allowing goals off of punts
My favorite Golden Girl, Estelle Getty was still alive and making Wasson hard
OJ Simpson wasn't a convict
Lindsey Lohan was still blowing dudes and coke
Berryman began his swinging lifestyle
Barnes was still wowing us with his large man nipples in his tight jersey
Darilek started growing his comb over
Kblische was a bachelor and could buy soccer shoes when he wanted
#19 had one of those job things
Tommy, Berryman, Jacobs, FnJ, Joel Osteen, PLopez, Nate, double dave all scored goals during kendalls pussy drought
The fading stars were a championship team

Game Summary

FSFC put out a solid starting lineup with an excellent bench- Windy conditions and Kblische picks to play into the wind 1st half
10 minutes in, the FSFC get the first breakaway as #19 plays Kblische thru- Kblische hits a low far post shot that the keeper gets a paw on
Minutes later the FSFC win a free kick at midfield- ball gets chipped long to a wide open #19 who is 1v1 with the keeper and he uses his club foot to deftly chip the keeper and of course the goal
FS are pretty much controlling the play and the defense is not really giving up great scoring chances
BizMarkie joins the fracas and gets loose down the right side and crosses to 12 where Kblische falls down, Bobby1 wiffs and the ball lands at the feet of a wide open Jihad who shoots his load into the parking lot
10 minutes left and rapper BizMarkie makes a run down the right side and gets taken down just outside the 18- Bobby1 lofts the free kick to the back post where Kendall gets his big head on the ball and heads it straight up into the net. Kendall gets some trim 1 Bomberos 0
2 minutes to go and the bomberos are parked inside the FSFC box- FSFC miss 5 opportunities to clear the ball and Neo gets the ball at the 18. #19 stupidly follows the orders of Sensai John Kreese and sweeps his leg. Ensuing free kick goes over the wall, hits Berryman in the hands and he is unable to keep it out of the net
Kobra Kai 1 Bomberos 1 Halftime
Kblische and Kendall try to get under #19's skin by feeding quotes from Neo- is it possible to a be a hippie and a Republican?
FSFC come out and absolutely work over the bomberos- ball moves from the left half to the right half, back and to the left, over to the Romo up top on the left half who plays a thru ball to #19 who says screw the far post and on the ground rips one near post high
FSFC 2 Ted Kacinzky 1
Just minutes later the run of play continues to be dominated by the FSFC and Jacobs plays a ball to Kblische who dummies the ball and #19 is off to the races again shooting this time with his healthy foot easily beats the keeper FSFC 3 Fireman? 1
The onslaught of missed opportunites begins again when Romo gets free 1v1 and his shot is saved by the keeper bounces off the post where #19 chases it down turns and passes to Romo standing solo at 8 and he proceeds to deftly shoot the ball at a car
Jihad works his arse off steals a ball at the end line from the keeper and defender dribbles unabated down the endline towards and empty goal and shoots the ball parallel to the goal line
The Bomberos attack after being given a huge life line- the sweeper takes a shot from the right 18, catches the wind perfectly and the ball happily nestles in the back of the net
FSFC 3 Bomberos 2
Its a game again- FSFC defend some corners, Berryman makes some saves, Kblische misses a breakaway, Romo gets another shot saved, Jacobs gets indecisive and blows a pass.
Bobby1 gets the idea with 7 minutes left he can come in the game for #19. What the fuck man? Oh nevermind, Berryman punts a ball deep- Bobby1 causes a fracas between the defender and the keeper, ball squirts losse where Bobby1 corrals the ball and gently rolls the ball into the open net. Nice job coaching #19 FSFC 4 Bomberos 2
Final FSFC 4 Bomberos 2

Goals: Kendall 1(1) #19 2(5) Bobby1 1(2)
Assts: Bobby1 1(4) Romo 1(2) Jacobs 1(1) Berryman 1(1)
Allowed: Berryman 2(3)

Defensive MVP- Kendall hurt arse and all
Offensive MVP- Bobby1
Goal of the Game: #19- not because it was a spectacular finish, but the passing leading up to the goal was the best in years
Players of the Game- Bench- FnJ, Double Dave n BizMarkie- solid play
Goat of the Game- Berardo- I have never seen a throw in go 1 inch before and be caught by the thrower
Its good to be above .500 for the first time this season

Lineup

GK Berryman
FB Jacobs
FB Kneals
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
HB Jihad
HB Berardo
CM Kblische
CM Bobby1
F #19
F Romo

Bench
FnJ
Double Dave
BizMarkie

Spring 2009 Vids y Mas 5

2009-02-12T10:14:00.002-06:00

USA vs Mehico Highlights

Here is the aftermath

FSFC Management has a new mandatory video

Jap Obama

New Sony something or other

For those of you that missed the Super Bowl VERY NSFW

Spring 2009 Game 5 FSFC 2 Caracole 5

2009-02-09T09:12:00.006-06:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No.10 2.8.09

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Caracole FC

Game Summary
1 picture to summarize the game- everything that can be done wrong is shown here. The guy is wearing a Brandeise Blue sweatshirt with 1 Hot pink sleeve and 1 sleeve Chartreuse (yellow for you color blind people) - notice the gray pornstache, flat black hat, polyesther slacks and penny loafers. Amazing this guy was alone at hooters enjoying a wrapped single beer, not watching the game on the tv 2 feet from him, but pretending to watch another tv but really staring down all the waitresses.

That shirt is almost as bad as the goalie scoring on a punt, a ball going thru the 3 foot hole in the wall, scoring a header from the 18 on your own goal, the ball sitting at the 6 with 3 people watching it, and pulling a trap when they have the ball inside the 18.

Here is the theme song for the defense

Final FSFC 2 Caracole 5

Goals: Kblische 1(3) BizMarkie 1(3)
Allowed: Ken 5 (13)

Yellow: #19 1(3)

Goal of the Game: Kblische- FSFC work the ball around the field, ball gets sent to Bobby1 who heads it to a wide open Kblische in the box who slips, cuts and hits his shot into the side netting

Defensive MVP: Ken- made 3 great saves

Goat of the Game: Ken- gave up 4 shit goals

Horse Shit Play of the Game 1: Tied 2-2 and controlling the game, the FSFC earn a corner that results in a shot saved by the keeper. Keeper punts the ball high and far that leaves Bergman and a craphole player chasing it- ball heads towards Ken who calls keeper, goes up for the ball, braces for a collision that never comes and the balls goes over is head and into the net

Donkey Balls Play of the Game 2: down 3-2 Berryman tries to give up a PK by fouling the player in the box- Ref gives the kick on the right side just off the 18. #19 sets the wall with Jihad and Berryman on the end. Ball is shot right at Berryman and Jihad, but Jihad jumps out of the way and the ball goes thru the wall and beats Ken.

Pedophile on Myspace Shit Play of the Game 3: Bobby1 commits a shirt grabbing foul at midfield- Ball is sent to the 18 where Berryman deftly heads the ball and easily beats Ken for the goal

So pissed I can't even Masturbate Play of the Game 4: 0-0 game, ball gets weakly sent into the box, Ken calls for the ball as it bounces at the 6, Double Dave watches as Ken doesn't move, and the forward taps the ball into the net

Quote of the Game: Berryman "Fuck this I am done" After his brilliant header beats his keeper for the well played Own Goal

Hooters MVP: Ken- fucking guy picked up the tab to make up for his less than stellar game

Lineup
GK? Ken
FB Bergman
FB Berryman
SW Jacobs
ST Kneals
HB BizMarkie
HB Jihad
CM Romo
CM Kblische
F #19
F Bobby1

Bench
Double Dave

Spring 2009 Game 4 Intl Old Boys 2 FSFC 1

2009-02-03T19:53:00.004-06:00

Schertz Soccer Complex Field No.13

9:00 a.m. Int'l Old Boys FC vs Fading Stars

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB BizMikee
SW Jacobs
ST/CM #19
CM Bobby 1
HB Jihad
F Kblische

Bench
AWhite
Berardo

Game Summary

FSFC start the game with 8 and are praying someone else will decide to get off of their arse and show up
Despite playing attacking a team with only 7 field players, Intl is unable to do shit except miss traps and shank shots for the first 15 minutes-
Early fouls are a must when short players as it lets the other team know you aren't going to back down-
Berardo shows up making 8
Despite playing short, the FSFC have better opportunities and are abusing the slow Intl defense with 1v4 counter attacks
Early fouls are a sin when playing 10 vs 7 and Intl is sinning like Henry VII, fouling Kblische 40 yards out- BizMikee hammers the free kick and it easily beats the keeper , but sadly it rises at the last moment and rings the crossbar-
Intl corrals the rebound and attack 6 vs 3- ugly orange shoe guy beats bergman 1v1 and gets a cross off- Ken tries to punch the cross and misses like a Buffalo kicker and the ball lands on the foot of a wide open Intl player who hits the open net Intl 1 FSFC 0
Awhite shows up making 9
Intl scores again on a shot the wind batted down nicely and easily beat a cheating Ken Intl 2 FSFC 0
Game is 2-0 but clearly the difference is the # of players on the pitch
Bobby1 gets loose and gets taken down from behind, inside the box, but b/c it was superstar referee that made the tackle no PK and only a yellow card
Halftime FSFC 0 Intl 2
Starting the half 10 v 11 makes a difference as Intl bad passing and worse shooting lead to only 1 scoring chance the entire 2nd half
Ball gets worked around to Jihad who makes a cut back from the left half and crosses to right half where Awhite uses the extra grease from his shit taco restraunt to chase down the ball- Awhite corrals the ball and hits a near post cross to the boot of Bobby1 who deftly re-directs the ball easily beating the keeper FSFC 1 Intl 2
10 minutes to go and Kblische takes on 3 defenders and goes down in a pile of shit- the makeup PK is awarded- The defender that fouled Kblische screams "You Mother Fucker, blah blah blah" at the referee- Ref only gives a yellow card- #19 approaches the ref that is being accosted and screamed at by 3 Intl Players and casually points out that the player just called him a Mother Fucker-
2 Intl players must have had their wheaties b/c they get in #19's face and act all tough which is really hard to do when your British and your soprano voice sounds like a pre-pubesent David Beckham- unfortunate to the badass that likes to shove he only got a yellow card and his balls still haven't dropped
Everything was setup for the ultimate outcome- down 2-1, playing short all game, Kblische on the penalty spot with a chance to tie the game--- Then Kblische channels his brother and hits the ball down the middle waist high for an easy save
Instead of rejoicing in the save, **World Cup superstar Lavery decides to yell at the ref some more and picks up a yellow card, but being the nice guy he is he says thank you
Missed PK pretty much ends the game
Intl 2 FSFC 1 FINAL

Awards and what we learned

We should have lost 5-0 playing short, but the 8 guys we had to start the game played 90 minutes of solid futbol and the 2 late arrivals would have changed the outcome if they could read a fucking clock
Kendall was too injured to play, however he can still dance
Players on the shit list for not giving any kind of notice of their playing status- FnJ, Double Dave
Communication is still horrid in the back- When the Sweeper or Keeper call for the ball, stop what you are doing and mark up

Awards:

Offensive MVP: Bobby1- Lone goal and drew what should have been a PK- Kblische and Bobby played 2 v 6 the entire game and played well

Defensive MVP: Jacobs- kept it together even with a stopper that had no idea what he was doing

Foul of the Game: Jihad- Jihad gets leveled on a 50/50 ball vs the counting crows lead singer, Chili who sports shitlocks. Shitlocks then engages #19 1v1 and tries to play the ball wide and run on to it. #19 beats him to the ball and is shielding it and just as it rolls out of bounds #19 goes down from a tackle from behind by Shitlocks- only problem was Jihad came out of nowhere knocking the piss out of Shitlocks and into #19 and Jihad is called for the foul and a free kick is awarded just outside the penalty box by the touch line.

Quote of the Game: Jihad- #19 to Jihad "What the fuck was with that foul" Jihad" He fucking deserved it!"

Goat of the Game: Kblische- this is tough as he busted his ass all game but, you just can't miss the PK so badly-

**Editors Note: After the game, Lavery approached #19 and thanked him for a nice game, however he refused to compliment him on the outstanding game summary from the last match**

Spring 2009 Links Y Mas 2

2009-01-30T09:49:00.004-06:00

Correctly Guess who's arse this is and win a prize

It disgusts me that someone would do something like this

I is practicing my flopping

I want this car

My life

Little Gordon Part 2

I got a hold of Kendalls Ipod and this link was the homepage on his browser, we still love you Kendall

Spring 2009 Game 3 FSFC 1 Bulverde 0

2009-01-27T09:31:00.003-06:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No.19 1.25.09

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Bulverde

Game Summary

The Fading Stars breakout the much anticipated Herpes Offense- the shanks spread from player to player and the outbreaks occur in the scoring area
Kblische with a shank, wide open #19 with a missed trap in the box, Kendall misses a header off a corner, Kblische sends one into the trees, #19 sends one into the trees, Bobby2 wideopen in the box hits the crossbar, #19 passes instead of shooting when wideopen in the box, Kblische gets loose in the box and hits the shot right to the keeper, #19 with a cracker off the post- BizMarkie hits a nubber from 35, Jacobs misses a header etc etc
Bergman gets matched up 1v1 with Bulverde's "best" player who thinks he is on Dancing with the Stars and starts to Tango- Bergman just stands still and shuts him down
Bobby1 gets matched up 1v1 with Bulverde's "special needs" player- the kid with the tube socks on beats Bobby1 badly and takes off down the field
10 Corner Kicks- no goals
0-0 Halftime
Halftime adjustments are putting Jihad on the special needs player as Bobby1 couldn't handle the assignment anymore
Herpes Offense Spreads to Jihad, Darilek, Kneals, Bobby1, Romo, and the carrier monkey Kblische
5 more Corners no goals
Berryman takes a nap
Bobby1 gets loose in the box and takes it to the endline where he passes to 12 to a wide open Mike BizMarkie who takes his time and puts the shot on frame and in the net FSFC 1 Bulverde 0
Yellow cards start flowing but the Herpes Offense continues to spread
Darileck takes a well advised shot from 45 that misses by 45 yards
Under 10 minutes to go and BizMarkie commits a foul just outside the 18. #19 sets the wall, Bulverde never asks for 10, they try a trick play touching the ball live and #19 beats the shooter to the ball and clears it. For some reason the ref gives them a do over
The wall is reset and Kendall blocks the do over then slides tackles clears the deflection to midfield and they end up playing the ball all the way back to the keeper- perfect defense
Fading Stars run out the clock
FSFC 1 Bulverde 0 FINAL

What we didn't learn and awards

This outcome was the exact same as last time we played Bulverde- Late goal after many missed shots and last time we gave up a kick just outside the 18 only Ken made a diving save to secure the win
0-15 on Corners- 4 of which where never in play
Valtrex has been ordered

Offensive MVP: Mike Bizmarkie- immune to the Herpes

Defensive MVP: Kendall- well run defense and kept Jacobs under control

Goal of the Game: BizMarkie with the delicate finish 2 goals in 3 games

Goat of the Game: everyone who missed the 30 shots

Goals: BizMarkie 1(2)
Assts: Bobby1 1(2)
Allowed: Berryman 0 (1)

Yellows: #19 1(2) Darilect 1(1) Kendall 1(1)

Lineup

GK Berryman
FB Bergman
FB Jacobs
SW Kendall
ST Darileck
HB Bobby1
HB Berardo
CM Romo
CM Kblische
F #19
F Jihad

Bench
Coach Migjet
Bobby2
Kneals
BizMarkie

Spring 2009 Game 2 FSFC 4 Foresaken 1

2009-01-19T12:06:00.008-06:00

NEYSO Bulverde Rd. Soccer Complex Field No. 4

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Forsaken

Game Summary

FSFC look vastly improved over last week's disaster-
#19 gets loose in the box on a pass from Kblische- the defender comes out of nowhere clears the ball and #19 flops to the ground rolling around in pain- Ref has a consultation with #19 and gives out the hard earned yellow card for diving- Flopping is unacceptable and will not be tolerated. Every time you flop Jesus kills a kitten
Fading Stars defend a corner and the foresaken FB comes up with the ball- #19 pressures a bad pass to their sweeper that Jihad picks off and takes to the 25- 2v1 Jihad passes to #19 who slots the breakaway past the keeper. #19 trips on his goal celebration and gets another yellow for diving FSFC 1 Foresaken 0
FSFC continue to create opportunities, Kendall off a header on a corner, #19 with a shot from 25, Kblische with a cracker-
Bobby1 gets molested in the box on loose ball and a free kick is given at the 19
Kblische unleashes a top shelf bomb that the keeper never moves FSFC 2 Foresaken 1
2-0 with 15 minutes left Foresaken cross a ball to the 18 where Kendall is waiting- er watching as the ball bounces right past him- Forward comes up with ball and beats Berryman near post. Team vote puts this one on Berryman
FSFC 2 Berrymans fuck up 1
Kblische gets his groove back beats a defender, plays the ball to Bobby1 who passes back and Kblische hits a left footed blast that drew some whoas from the sideline watching Blades
FSFC 3 Foresaken 1 Halftime
Foresaken control the first 15 minutes but have zero scoring chances-
#19 gets loose at the top of the 18 and beats the last defender with a pass to a wide open Kblische in the box 1v1 with the keeper- Kblische hits a shot that squirts wide of the toilet like a pint of loose stool at Hooters
FSFC continue the attack dominating pace of play
Ball gets crossed to the 18 where Jihad flies in the air screaming lalalalalal and uses his foot like a saif and chops off the infidels head winning the ball- Jihad then slashes the keeper and the ball stops at the end line where #19 is waiting and lets Jihad finish the goal. After reviewing the play with the goal is called back and Jihad swears death to the Israel
Bobby1 goes on another dribbling tangent- gets tangled up with 3 defenders- ball pops to #19 who plays wide to Jihad- #19 makes a run down the line and Jihad hits #19- #19 dribbles into the right side of the box- sees Mike BizMarkie making a run and lofts a pass that Bizmarkie strikes with his his noggin easily beating the keeper
FSFC 4 Foresaken 1 FINAL

Yo Joe and Awards

2 games in a row with outstanding attendance and early arrivals
Not Diving is now a yellow card so we might as well start diving
Communication still a problem in the back- Guys listen to your Sweeper

Offensive MVP: Kblische- Free kick goals are fun and so are left footed rips

Defensive MVP: Berryman- 1 lesser than 6

Goat of the Game: #19 Bad Flop in the box - next time scream and roll around

Goal of the Game: Kblische's left footer

Quote of the Game: #19 to Wasson at Hooters- "What are you gonna do with the rest of your day besides sit at home and whack off to Sit and Be Fit (video for Berardo)

Goals #19 1(2) Kblische 2(2) BizMarkie 1(1)
Assist: #19 1(2) Jihad 1(2) Bobby1 1(1)
Allowed: Berryman 1(1)

Yellow: #19 1(1) Diving

Lineup

GK Berryman
FB Jacobs
FB Bergman
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
HB Berardo
HB Bobby2
CM Kblische
CM Romo
F #19
F Jihad

Bench
JP Kneal
Bobby1
FnJ
Double Dave
Bizmarkie

Spring 2009 Vids y Mas 1

2009-01-15T11:45:00.003-06:00

Steven Barnes will be having a tryout with this team on Sunday- Please make sure you watch #7's hip breaking moves and telescopic shot at the 4:00 minute mark under the Dragons-Gunners video(yellow team)- Let's all pray that Steven brings his A game and can make this stellar squad

Manu vs Wade in open court- who ya got?

Coach I think I brokeded my leg

Little Gordon Ramsay Part 1

Highlights from Romo's Poker Game

Fall 2008 Links y Mas Final Edition

2008-12-22T12:31:00.004-06:00

Rusty takes a dive

If The FSFC Defense played against Messi

Who says the economy is bad?

Kendall's latest music video

And Finally my Xmas gift to you

Fall 2008 Game 10 FSFC 3 Caracole 2

2008-12-08T10:23:00.006-06:00

NEYSO Specht Road Complex No. 20 MAP
9:00 a.m. Caracole vs Fading Stars 12.7.08

After being thrown the game time change from 3 pm to 9 am it was shocking to have 3 people at the field when #19 arrived at 8:30
Refs delaying the game so we can start with a whopping 7 players was nice of them
Opening kick off Bobby1 sends a pass to #19 who misses the trap then chases the ball down before it hits the endline and clears it past the cars so we can add a player or two
Berryman chases down the 6'3 170 forward and wins the ball multiple times
somehow the FSFC win a corner kick that is headed right to the foot of Double Dave who deftly places the ball in the side net 1-0 FSFC
Pblische joins the game giving us 11; ball is played to Pblische and he pulls up gimp making the 11th player essentially Awhite
#19 gets called for a very weak foul after the player hands the ball to a feet. On the ensuing free kick, Ken gets saved by a post, the ball rebounds to the unmarked rotund forward at the six who misses the open net by 10 yards
FSFC win a throw in down the right side that Pblische tosses to the middle of the box, Bobby1 comes down with the ball, fakes a shot, dribbles twice and places the ball in the net FSFC 2 Crapole 0 Halftime
Crapole control most of the 2nd half and play kick ball attacking Berryman with their 6'3 adonis- Berryman does his best to sodomize him, butt spends most of his time attacking from behind
The rotund forward for the Crapole's gets a ball laid off to him at the 25 and hits a fucking cracker that rips the upper 90- very nice shot FSFC 2 Crapole 1
FSFC counter when Bobby1 gets loose on the outskirts of town and crosses the ball to the six where #19 streaks in front of the keeper, traps the ball with his thigh, gets wiped out by the defender and the ball trickles into the net- power speed and touch, that is the white mans way FSFC 3 Cirque de Crapole 1
Jacobs gets a yellow card for denigrating the official- sidenote The powers that be have expressed great concern with Jacobs attitude and restitution will be forthcoming
Ball gets played into the Fading Stars box and is loose, #19 beats the crapole's forward to the ball gets his leg swept like the Karate Kid and gets called for a foul. PK is somehow awarded FSFC 3 Kobra Kai 2
It is a 3 to 2 game and Ken makes a bunch of easy saves and decides to punt every ball 40 yards downfield and 40 yards out of bounds down the field next to us killing at least 5 minutes. His goal kicks where just as brilliantly bad
Final FSFC 3 Crapole 2

Goals: Bobby1 1(1) DoubleDave 1(1) #19 1(1)
Assts: Pblische 1(1) Bobby1 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 2(16)

Yellows: Jacobs 1(2) Bobby2 1(3) #19 1(5)

Yo Joe, Knowing is half the battle and Awards:

Why do we have 24 people on the roster, starting with 7 is not fun
Kudos to Berardo for changing his work schedule so he could play the 3pm game- too bad they decided 12 hours before the game to change the time
Drinking till 6 am is not a good idea when the game is a 9 am Kblische and Kendall- ps to Kendall those bumps on your wang are not normal

Offensive MVP: Bobby1- despite it being 60 degrees, he overcame the cold b/c of his gloves and went 1 goal 1 asst

Defensive MVP: Berryman- Berryman was matched up with a guy that was taller than him, skinnier than him, better looking than him, bigger penis than him, better tan than him, faster than him, better eyesight than him, nicer car than him, bigger apartment than him, more girth than him, healthier liver than him, better hair than him and no student loans. Yet, Berryman shut his fucking ass out, stole the ball at least 5 times and shielded at least 4 1v1 kick balls out of bounds the whole while shutting GayRod out. This was one small step forward for World of Warcraft players and one giant leap for Dungeon and Dragons players throughout mankind.

Goal of the Game: #19- Who else can score with the thigh? Nobody that is who

Lineup

GK Ken
SW/ST Bergman
FB Berryman
HB/FB Jihad
HB Bobby2
CM #19
CM DoubleDave
F Bobby1

Bench

Raul
Jacobs
Pblische
Romo IR
Tommy IR

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 7

2008-12-05T11:11:00.002-06:00

Hockey is for pussies

More fighting

Nice Xmas video

Pblische contributes a soccer practice video- swear i have seen this before

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 6

2008-11-21T09:33:00.002-06:00

The only Notre Dame fan I like

How to fix the Spurs with 1 trade

Amazing plane landing

Fnj's Brother in Law "Kid Suit"

Funny File Cabinet Fail - Watch more Free Videos

Gotta love the flip throw in

Fall 2008 Game 8 Rangers FC 0 FSFC 3

2008-11-18T09:52:00.002-06:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex No. 13 MAP TO FIELDS

9:00 a.m. Rangers FC vs Fading Stars 11.16.08

Game Summary

Rangers FC control play for the first 20 minutes as the FSFC work in another new lineup
Ken controls the game early making the easy saves
FSFC successfully run the trap 5 times suffocating the offense
After another offsides call, the ball is quickly restarted and a high bounding ball is played deep to #19 down the right side who blindley flicks the ball over the sweeper and stopper to a wide open Kblische. Kblische corrals the ball at the 18 dribbles in and easily beats Opie
FSFC 1 Rangers 0
Halftime arrives and the FSFC have their first lead in 4 games
2nd half is more of the same, Rangers dribble, dribble dribble then hit weak shots sometimes at the goal
Defense struggles to clear the ball multiple times and give up 4 straight corner kicks
Fading Stars win a throw in at midfield- Awhite sends it down the line to Kblische- who beats his mark and heads down the field. The Rangers sweeper inexplicably calls for the trap 30 yards out and #19 and Jihad circle back leaving Kblische with a clear path to the goal. Kblische dribbles down the left side unabated and beats Opie far post FSFC 2 Rangers 0
Fading Stars are content to defend and counter attack with the lead.
#19 wins a throw deep down the right half- throws it back to Kblische who dribbles up and blasts a perfect cross to the back post where Bobby2 hits a textbook header straight down making it impossible for the keeper to save. FSFC 3 Rangers 0
Final FSFC 3 Rangers FC 0

Goals: Kblische 2(3) Bobby2 1(1)
Assts: #19 1(2) Awhite 1(1) Kblische 1(1)

Allowed: Ken 0(9) 2nd Clean Sheet

Yellow Cards: D Darilect

Knowing is half the battle and Awards:

Clearly TOP is not an important stat to win
Kblische playing with a stinky wrist brace resumes his chase for the Goldish Boot
When marking on corner kicks- the defenders need to run with your mark not stand around with your thumb up your ass
Berryman dribbles good for a fat guy

Goal of the Game: Kblische from #19- changed the game for good

Offensive MVP: Kblische- Welcome back Carter

Defensive MVP: Ken- 2nd clean sheet of the season

Quote of the Game: Romo- "This is the healthiest I have been since Cinco" #19damus "Great sounds like you are getting hurt today" Sure enough Romo tries to play defense and leaves the game with a softball on his ankle

Goat of the Game: Kblische- trying to throw the ball in with a broken arm is not a good plan

WTF of the Game: Jihad gets loose and lays the ball off to #19 at the top of the 18- instead of shooting #19 hears FnJ calling for the ball in the box- #19 plays the ball to a wideopen defender and no FnJ in sight. Shoot the ball you jackass

Lineup

GK Ken
FB FnJ
FB Berryman
SW Bergman
ST D Darilect
HB Bobby2
HB JP
CM KBlische
CM #19
F Romo
F Jihad

Bench
Migjet Coach
Awhite
Tommy IR
PMJMD

Fall 2008 Game 7 FSFC 1 Chelsea FC 1

2008-11-11T15:47:00.002-06:00

Soccer International Complex No. 13 MAP TO FIELDS

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Chelsea FC 11.9.08

Game Summary

Kendall has vowed to have sex with that beautiful woman to end the scoring drought
still can't get 11 people to show up on time
Ken gives up a very soft goal on a floater 1-0
Fading Stars get back in the game on a short corner to Speetey who dribbles for 10 yards and puts a beauty cross off of Bodo's knee 1-1
2nd Half
Bobby 2 gets tossed for 2 yellow card fouls
Kendall annihilates a player on a slide tackle
Final 1-1

Goals: Bodo 1(2)
Assts: Berardo 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 1(9)

Yellow Cards: Bobby2 2(2) #19 1(4)
Red Cards: Bobby2 1(1)

Offensive MVP: none

Defensive MVP: Ken- saved plenty of shots

Hack of the Game: how Raul didn't get a card for his 8 fouls is beyond me

Tackle of the Game: Kendall with a destruction that cleared the ball 40 yards out of bounds and put the Chelsea player on his head

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB FnJ
SW Jacobs
ST Darilect
HB Speetey
HB Bodo
CM Rudy
CM Bobby2
F #19
F Jihad

Bench
Awhite
Kendall
Alex
Bodo
JP
Romo
Migjet
Coach K

Fall 2008 Game 6 FSFC 0 Ft Sam Houston 2

2008-11-04T09:40:00.002-06:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex No. 12 MAP TO FIELDS

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Ft. Sam Houston FC 11.2.08

Game Summary

we started with 11 thanks to the clock falling back an hour
Bodo makes a comment about how he hates losing to a team with a girl on it
Game is pretty even for the first 25 minutes
Bobby1 gets loose in side the box and misses his far post shot wide left
Ft Sam counter and play a long ball to #17 who races past Bergman and scores Ft sam 1-0
1-0 Halftime
FSFC dominate the first 10 minutes of the 2nd half- Bobby1 dribbles into the box and lays the ball off for Alex who misses the wide open shot high
Ft Sam counter and hit a shot right at Ken who fumbles the rebound, no defenders follow and #17 scores again 2-0
Following last weeks script, the FSFC begin their last minute heroics
Pblische gets loose several times and just can't finish
Rusty takes a beauty of a dive in the box earning a PK
Pblische takes the PK and hits it exactly like last week only this time the keeper cleared the shot
Pblische gets loose again, keeper makes the save and #19 heads the rebound over the net
We can't score
Final FSFC 0 Ft Sam Houston 2

Goals: None
Allowed: Ken 2(8)

PK's- Pblische 0/1

Knowing is half the battle and Awards

We will be sacrificing a live chicken next sunday to get rid of the goal scoring curse
playing the Army is no fun as they are too nice
Attendance was exactly what we needed- too bad everyone was hung over
Ken was gracious to give up 2 goals to a guy shipping off to Afghanistan on Friday- Way to go Ken!
2 bets where established during the game
Romo and JP will be taking on #19 and Berryman in a little 2v2 basketball- Romo claims to have a sky hook- but we all know with his jumping ability it will be more of a ground hook
The other bet Rusty and Jihad have is whether #19 has a bigger hog than the 6'4 black guy from another field. #19 is the heavy favorite in this battle

Offensive MVP: NONE

Defensive MVP: None

Quote of the Game: Bodo "I hate losing to teams with a girl" What he really should have said was I hate having a girl beat me 1v1 4 times

Lineup

GK Ken
FB JP
FB Berardo
ST Darilek
SW Bergman
HB Berryman
HB Raul
CM #19
CM Bobby1
F Rusty
F Jihad

Bench

Coach K
Migjet
Bobby2
Bodo
Romo
Alex
Pblische

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 5

2008-10-31T10:08:00.002-05:00

Gotta love the city of brotherly love

Goal! nope

That crazy Poppovich

Ken's Japanese Brother

Baby Wee Wee

Fall 2008 Game 5 FSFC 3 Real Azteca Jr 3

2008-10-27T13:44:00.006-05:00

This painting is Called 11 oclock- This shitty painting reminds me of what starting with 9 players feels like.

Game Summary

11 oclock rolls around and we have 8 players
Starting lineup consisted of the 6th string Sweeper in Bergman and at least the 8th string Stopper in #19
Fading Stars actually hang in there for the first 10 minutes when Bodo and Berardo boot up and give us a full squad
Rusty rings the post
Jihad gets the ball wide open in the box, and he struggles to finish just like when he has sex with a veil less woman.
Real Azteca get a 5 v 3 counter attack and make a quick pass and shot that Ken flubs a wee bit- Real Azteca 1 FSFC 0
Jihad redeems himself on the next ball and one times it into the net- Too bad Rusty was 5 yards ahead of him offsides.
Even match and with a minute left Sean hits a wide open Romo who get this dribbles with the ball for 15 yards and sends a deftly weighted pass to Bodo- Bodo takes it into the box and finishes side netting- too bad Bodo was offisides- of wait no he wasn't Real JR 1 FSFC 1 HALFTIME
Pblische decides to join us from his Co-Ed game 4 fields over
Coach K takes over from Migjet
Real Azteca continuously work the outside of the field and bring constant pressure leaving Bergman to run down countless players
Romo gets lose again and hits a cracker that the keeper makes a diving save
Real get back on the board after a missed clear and a nice pass by Gordo to to the kid in the penny who gets off a shot that beats a sliding #19 and Ken Azt JR 2 FSFC 1
Real keep up the counter attacking strategy on the outside halves and fullbacks and work a cross to penny kid at the top of the 18- He hits a nice shot that beats ken again Azteca Jr 3 FSFC 1
Under 10 minutes left Coach K decides to press and thank god moves #19 up
#19 draws a just outside the 18 and Romo hits a shot that deflects off the keeper and the rebound comes right to Rusty who tries to finish but finds it hard with his jersey getting stretched
Pblische gets free on the end line- takes on the keeper and runs his shot parallel to the goal line
Stan Kelly gets on the PA and for the final time gives his nasaly "Tw0000000 minutes" announcement
Sean chips a ball into a wide open Rusty who goes 1v1 with the keeper, Rusty beats the keeper with a quick dribble and pays the price of two cleats one ankle. PK and Red card awarded
Pblische lines up to take the PK, while the Jr team try to distract the ref and waste the clock- Pblische hits an average shot that the keeper gets a hand on but it still goes in the net Real Azteca 3 FSFC 2
1 minute left and Real has the kickoff
#19 goes from a calm Bruce Banner to a green ball hawking machine forcing a back pass, chasing the ball down, stealing the ball, passes to Pblische in the middle while decleating a poor Jr player JTrain style.
Pblische carries it down the middle, beats two defenders but pushes the ball to far and the sweeper gets it from him. Green #19 runs over and steals the ball and gets it back to Pblische at the 12- Pblische puts on a sick move and burries the ball in the net Real Azteca 3 FSFC 3
10 seconds left and the whistle blows
Final FSFC 3 Real Azteca Jr 3
Goals: Pblische 2(5) Bodo 1(1)
Assts: Romo 1(1) #19 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 3(6)

Yellow Cards: #19 1(3)

Learning is Half the Battle and Awards:.

It really is more fun to end a game with 9 than it is to start with 9
Scheduling conflicts with the co-ed team are not helpful
where the hell is the $80 soccer ball?
3 goals in the final minutes of the halves- what the fuck did we do the other 87 minutes?
Defensive MVP: Bergman- dude probably ran a good 8 miles during this game and did a great job covering the pitch

Offensive MVP: Pblische- anytime you score the game tying goal in the last minute

Play of the Game: Bergman- running towards our goal chasing a forward, Bergman manages to no look elbow clear the ball away- his arms are a like a fucking tractor beam to the ball

Goal of the Game: Pblische- with a little help from green 19

Beer VP: Romo- guess a $50 contribution ain't much when you win at Poker

Churchill Post of the Game: Rusty

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Raul
FB JP
SW Bergman
ST #19
HB Jihad
HB Rusty
CM R
CM Romo

Bench
Migjet
Coach K
Berardo
AWhite
Bobby 2
Berryman
Pblische
Sean

Fall 2008 Game 4 FSFC 1 SAC2 0

2008-10-19T21:44:00.004-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex No. 19 MAP TO FIELDS
1:00 p.m. SAC 2 vs Fading Stars Sunday 10.19.08

The History of the Alamo as taught at SAC

Back in the olden days, there was a fort in San Antone that was illegally being occupied by White Folks. Now these white folks where all about enslaving Texas and setting up a border to prevent the Mexicans from working north of the Rio Grande. Now the Mexican army rolled in 5000 flat belly soldiers and surrounded the Alamo and offered the whites a chance to surrender. Well, them white folks in the Alamo were old, and fat and hell the redneck doctor from tennesee wore a rat skin hat instead of a toupee. Old William Travis Ken took out his pecker and drew a line in the sand and said "Fuck it if I am going to die it ain't going to by a bunch of kids that can't fucking shoot!"

Well the battle began and the Mexican army attacked and attacked but couldn't penetrate the fort. Ol' Travis was right- they may be younger than us, skinnier than us but shot worse than the ATF in Waco. Them white boys sat right at the entrance of that fort, well some of them hung out at Rivercenter mall smoking weed and drinking an Orange Julius.
By golly at the end of the day, them white boys where still standing and Texas Independence was won.

Goals: Pblische 1(3)
Allowed: Ken 0(3)

Yellow Cards: #19 1(2) In the lead bitches!

Goal of the Game: Pblische- Rusty allows the SAC sweeper to run him over on a bouncing ball getting a free kick 20 yards out. Pblische hits a decent cracker that easily beats the overmatched keeper

Quote of the Game: Tommy- "And the Russian judge gives him a 10!" After SAC player takes a horrendous dive in the box

Churchill Post of the Game: Pblische- that a boy!- note- Ken was also saved by 2 posts by the SAC players.

Defensive MVP: Close call between Ken, Darilek and Bergman but the award goes to #19- Just kidding this one goes to Berryman who swept clean at least 3 balls inside the 6

Offensive MVP: Pblische- Even though he played Sweeper he still scored, missed an upper 90 rip and got a posty toast

Bender Hustle Player of the Game: Tommy- Borrowing shorts, socks, boots, guards and sporting a shirt way too tight- Tommy comes off the IR to do just enough to bail out an exhausted and under staffed lineup

Starting Lineup Finishing Lineup
GK Ken GK Ken
FB Bergman FB Bergman
FB Berryman FB Berryman
SW Pblische SW Darileck
ST Darilek ST Tommy
HB Jihad HB Jihad
HB Berardo HB Rusty
CM #19 CM #19
CM Alex CM none
F Rusty F None
F Romo F Romo

Bench

Tommy

Had to leave the game at half or just after

Pblische, Alex and Berardo

What we learned-

The 12 players that played against a team of flat bellies with 5 subs truly showed what the FSFC is all about- Everyone was tired except Darilek- Tommy and Romo played hurt and could barely run yet nobody quit. Pblische, Alex and Berardo stuck around as long as they could, played as hard as they could until commitments took them elsewhere. Everyone on the pitch today proved a competitive fire and spirit that very few players and teams ever show on any level and in any sport.

Hell the Mexican army couldn't shoot for shit but that ain't our fault.

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 4

2008-10-17T09:03:00.003-05:00

New Sarah Palin video

Video from Bobo's 4th Wedding

If you believe they put a man on the moon

A must watch sex ed E-Book

I didn't know there where 3 Corky Thatchers

New Tissue Queen Video

Fall 2008 Game 3 FSFC 2 Intl Old Boys 2

2008-10-06T23:42:00.004-05:00

Soccer International Complex Field No. 9 MAP TO FIELDS October 5th

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Int'l Old Boys

Game Summary

1st Half Highlights
Even match with tons of space for both offenses as neither midfield could get back
FSFC has multiple opportunities to score but the bad mojo prevents an early lead
Intl old boys get the lead as Kendall gets worked over by orange shoe guy beating him 1v1 and then proceeds to toe poke the ball into the net 0-1
FSFC win a corner kick that gets bounced around, Jihad takes a crack that is stopped by a handball, ball bounces to the six where Intl's Wolfie tries to clear but pops the ball in the air.
#19 winks at Berardo while the ball is in the air and awaits the impending foul- Like Clayton Williams said "Rape is like the weather, you know its coming so you might as well enjoy it" #19 gets run over by Wolfie earning the PK that Pblische finishes easily 1-1
Halftime 1-1
Plenty of free space, but lots of bad passes prevent the rout
Intl gets on the board again as their forward makes a touch and shot that beats Darilek and Ken 2-1
Pblische finally gets free inside the 18, jukes the ever living shit out of 2 defenders and the keeper and buries the ball in the net 2-2
The Fun begins...
The superstar referee, Jason, that "plays" for Intl can't keep his fucking mouth shut and is trying to dictate the game
#19 gets carded for telling him to shut the fuck up
Ball is played in the box, Ken calls "Keeper". Kendall runs away, dumbass forward backs into a ball that Ken punches away and knocks the guy on his ass. Justifiably no foul was called. World Cup superstar Lavry takes offense. Ken says "OK Grandpa" and a 5 minute Intl hug fest prevents an ass beating. Superstar ref Jason keeps running his mouth.
10 minutes left, Intl forward gets loose 1v1 vs Ken. Ken gets the ball, drops it and clips the forward- PK awarded.
Of all the people to take the PK they choose Orange Shoe guy- This fucking guy lines up for the PK and takes a divot so bad that grass will never grow again in that spot. The ball trickles wide left like a Scott Norwood cumshot.
Ending minute FSFC attack hard and play a dangerous ball in the box, World Cup superstar Lavry tries to clear but whiffs and the ball lands between his legs, he holds the ball in his knees and #19 kicks the shit out of the ball- Ref blows the whistle for dangerous play, superstar Lavry kicks #19 as hard as his feeble scottish leg could.
Instead of tossing the World Cup superstar and giving the free kick to the FSFC, the ref bows to intimidation and blows the final whistle.
Final 2-2

Goals: Pblische 2(2)
Assists: None
Allowed: Ken 2(3)
PK Fouls: Ken 1(1)
PK Goals: Pblische 1(1)

Yellow Cards: #19 1(1)

What We Learned and Awards

Unless we give out new jerseys every week attendance is horse shit
Coach K's 0-1-1 start is worse than Sherman at A&M
Props to Intl Old boys for 6 yellow cards, intimidating the ref but they didn't play any of their 1st division players

Offensive MVP: Pblische- 2 goals

Defensive MVP: Bergman- no goals, no handballs

Quote of the Game: Ken "Ok Grandpa"

Tackle of the Game: Ken- With his knock out clear of the forward

Pussy of the Game: The 11 players that had other things to do

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Jacobs
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
CM A
CM Pblische
HB Berardo
HB Berryman
F #19
F Jihad

Bench

Coach K
JP
Raul

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 3

2008-10-03T15:50:00.002-05:00

Midget MMA is awesome

Rachel Ray is a true fatty

The long awaited Sarah Palin sex tape

Trex at the Gym

Finally Berrymans Bachelor Party

Funny Videos | Funny Cartoons | More Video Clips

Fall 2008 Game 2 FSFC 0 Aztecas 2

2008-09-30T12:20:00.002-05:00

NEYSO Specht Road Complex Field No. MAP TO FIELDS

11:00 a.m. Azteca FC vs Fading Stars 9.28.08

Game Summary

Starting goalie on vacation with his mistress, backup goalie on vacation with 1000 computer nerds- bad omen
Kendall gets MVP for kidnapping Nate and gently raping him
Game gets off to a sloppy start as we are forced to start players out of position
Bergman does a decent job in goal making the necessary saves and toe poking his goal kicks to midfield.
Kendall goes to the sideline with a boo boo during an Azteca free kick. Ball gets played and the shot easily beats Bergman 1-0
FSFC are hanging in and getting some easy opportunities, Kendall gets lose at the 6 and kicks it right at the goalie
Bodo falls down for the 6th time in the first half negating opportunities
the Aztecas get a free kick in our defensive end, ball gets played to the back 18 to an unmarked man who hits a really weak shot right at Bergman. Bergman bends down to get the ball and it goes through his legs into the goal 2-0
Halftime down 2-0 but these guys are not good
Fading Stars outshoot the Aztecas 3-1 in the second half and can't score
Bodo misses 2 1v1's with the keeper, Kendall skies for a corner and heads high. Jacobs heads a free kick to the 10 where Kendall chuffs the shot and it goes to Jihad who scores- too bad he was offsides.
The Dali Romo gets a yellow card on the sideline

Goals: None
Allowed: Bergman 2(2)

Yellow Cards: FnJ 1(1) Romo 1(1) Bodo 1(1)

Awards:

Defensive MVP: Nate
Offensive MVP: Kendall

Lineup

GK Bergman
FB Jacobs
FB Payne
SW Nate
ST Kendall
HB Berardo
HB Jihad
CM Romo
CM JP
F #19
F Bodo

Bench
Migs
FnJ
Awhite
Tommy IR
Kblische IR

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 2

2008-09-26T11:34:00.004-05:00

My Vote has been Won

The Cubs are destined for failure

Green Gatorade

Slow Week so let's watch the Greatest QB of all time work some magic

Friday Workout Video

Kendall submits SFW Porn

and finally the long awaited Tom Wasson sex video- this video is NSFW

DO NOT CLICK ON THIS LINK UNLESS YOU ARE A SICK INDIVIDUAL OF AT LEAST 18 YEARS - THIS VIDEO WILL GET YOU FIRED IF YOU ARE AT WORK- IT WILL GIVE YOU NIGHTMARES UNLESS OF COURSE YOU THINK ITS THE FUNNIEST VIDEO EVER LIKE I DO

Fall 2008 Game 1 FSFC 2 vs Mercenary FC 1

2008-09-22T11:51:00.002-05:00

Soccer International Complex Field No. 13 MAP TO FIELDS

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Mercenary FC

Game Summary

If only Wasson where at the game to perform his cast of thousands routine
It is Amazing what the prospect of new uniforms does for attendance
AWhite shows up late and remarks that with the matching uniforms we now are one of those teams we make fun of
#19 Jr makes his debut and has some skills- but he kept dribbling the ball away from the goal and towards the sideline- A paternity suit has been filed against Bodo
Rusty makes his return from maternity leave and still has his Joey

Game gets off to an even start and the flat bellies are frustrated minutes into the game by the FSFC pressure
Pblische gets off several early blasts and scoring opportunities are a plenty
Our new #10 jersey gets off to a start as he picks off a ball at the 35, takes on 2 defenders, gets whacked at the 18 and rips a shot into the side netting 1-0
The mercenary squad starts fouling on every ball in the air and start getting pissy as their offense continues to sputter
Pblische gets a steal and does his patented juke out 3 defenders, makes the keeper fall down and gets his open net shot cleared off of the line.
Halftime 1-0
Picture time- according to the US Government, a certain member of the squad is unable to be in the team photo and is forced to be team photographer.
2nd half begins much the way of the 1st half, with some ugly soccer and lots of fouls.
Bergman gives up another happy hand ball, but the free kick is cleared by the wall- Romo steps in front of the mercenary player winning the ball but is called for a mythical elbow. While Ken is trying to set the wall, the ref lets the free kick go and it beats Ken high and tight 1-1
Ken gets his revenge as a ball is deflected towards the end line and out of any danger- bald and shiny #7 for mercs gives chase and jumps in the air- Ken gives chase punches the ball away deftly knocks #7 into the wire fence.
#7 takes about 30 seconds untangling himself and after his teammates get in front of him, decides to take on Ken. #7 gets his second yellow and Ken happily accepts his yellow.
Pblische gets off a cracker that the keeper makes a nice save on
Rusty heads a cross to the middle of the box that Kendall over runs and does his best Rene Higuita impersonation and just misses Winning Goal of the Year.
Kblische chips a ball into the box that #19 runs onto and just when he looks up a charging rhino knocks him on is ass earning the PK
Darilect steps up to the spot, studies the Rhino and hits the ball 4mph into the net 2-1.
Whilst running out the clock, Kblische steps on the ball, eats shit and breaks his arm.
Final 2-1

Goals: Kblische 1(1) Darilect 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 1(1)

Yellow Cards: Ken 1(1) Jacobs 1(1)- Definite trend here

Goal of the Game: Kblisches and 1

Foul of the Game: Ken taking out a player and a fence

Quote of the Game: Rusty- "We need to take up a collection to buy Bodo's girlfriend some underwear" #19- "What the fuck is wrong with you Obama- we don't need change"

Hack of the Game: Ken off to the early start, but Raul is slowly replacing the legendary Barnes

Offensive MVP: Pblische- despite his occasional over dribbling he put constant pressure the D

Defensive MVP: Ken- he just scares me

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Jacobs
SW Kendall
ST Darilect
HB Jihad
HB Speetey
CM Nate
CM Kblische
F #19
F Pblische

Bench

Romo
Bodo
FnJ
Raul
AWhite
JP
Rusty
Migs DNP
Tommy DNP

Fall 2008 Vids y Mas 1

2008-09-19T12:55:00.002-05:00

Knockout

MigsJet is a Survivor

I expect Ken to do this for the team picture

Let's hope that after Ken Bergman gives up a PK, they shoot like this

Pure Gold

Summer 2008 2 Game 8 SA Gunners 1 FSFC 2

2008-09-15T11:35:00.003-05:00

NEYSO Specht Road Complex Field No. 19 MAP TO FIELDS
9:00 a.m. SA Gunners vs Fading Stars

This video sums up the offense, as I think we had every one of the misses

Game Summary

Raul dribbles down the end line and passes to #19 at the six who buries it top shelf- thank god #19 was that close or we would have had an all time miss
Jacobs goes 50/50 on a ball, guy slide tackles then trips Jacobs- no foul is called and the guy gets up with the ball so Jacobs takes him out from behind just outside the 18 earning him a nice yellow card and locking up his Hacker of the Season Award
Fading Stars miss about 10 easy goals
1-0 Half
The poor finishing continues
With 10 minutes left, Jihad gets the ball in the middle and completes a pass to a wide open Kblische who literally walks the ball into the goal after he leaves the mouthy goal keeper flopping on the ground looking like a fish 2-0
The ugly game is in hand, the FSFC have the field spread and are passing it around. Kendall heads wide ride at midfield, Bobby2 has the ball on the left at midfield and makes a perfectly weighted pass to the a wide open player- on the other team. Guy has a breakaway with no one but Darilek to chase after him and he beats Ken with the shot
Final 2-1

Goals: #19 1(6) Kblische 1(10)
Assts: Raul 1(2) Jihad 1(2)
Allowed: Ken 1(15)

Yellow: Raul 1(1) PMJMD 1(3)

Awards:

Foul of the Game: PMJMD- The take down from behind after the no call was a thing of beauty.

Goal of the Game: Kblische- All Beckham had to do was quit shooting

Quote of the Game: Ken- After Ken catches an easy shot he yells at the other keeper "This is what you don't do- GET THAT SHIT OUTTA HERE" Then Ken proceeds to punt the ball to emphasis his point- only he shanks the shit out of the ball and it goes out of bounds after traveling a whole 20 yards

Churchill Post of the Game: Kblische- we hit a post!

Defensive MVP: Kendall-

Offensive MVP: Impossible to decide with the outstanding finishing

Goat of the Game: Bobby2- he bails out the #19, Kblische and Bodo with his perfect pass to the other team

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Handball Bergman
FB Jacobs
SW Kendall
ST Darilek
HB Berryman
HB Jihad
CM Raul
CM Speetey
F #19

Bench
Bodo
Kblische
Bobby 2
Migs

Summer 2008 2 Vids y Mas Ocho

2008-09-12T09:52:00.003-05:00

First Video of Hurricane Ike

Vote Palin

At last, The Intertron Phenom 2 girls 1 cup

Holy Christ

Summer 2008 2 Game 7 FSFC 2 Intl Old Boys 5

2008-09-09T22:56:00.002-05:00

Sunday September 7, 2008
Soccer International Complex Field No. 12 MAP TO FIELDS
9:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Int'l Old Boys FC

The ego of Steve Jennings knows no bounds even if his soccer skills do- After we beat this team 5-4 on 3.30.08; the vow was made to FnJ that the next time they played us they would bring their 1st division players and they did.
The international pussies had 7 1st division players and a total of 12 subs and it took every single one of them to beat us
Memo to Gary, who I know reads this, please let us bring our first division players onto the pitch next time we play these cunts

Game Summary

The first division team that practices control the game playing 1-2's all over the pitch and constantly playing the ball ball wide.
FSFC get on the board first after one of the illegal aliens commits a foul 40 yards out. Kblische sends the free kick to the back of the left six where Pblische traps it and chips it to the middle of the six where #19 flicks it to the right corner, gets a gentle bounce from the post and settles in the side netting 1-0 FSFC
The FSFC defense holds up strong for another 10 minutes until an illegal hits a shot that Ken saves, but gives up a salty rebound that no defender covers and he taps in the equaliver 1-1
Here is where the BS begins- Darilek stuffs a wanker on his run just outside the endline, the wanker gets up starts talking shit and realizes he wants none of Darilek. He walks up to Bobby2 and pokes him in the eye- Bobby2 shoves him and is ready to go. Meanwhile, JP decides to talk shit to the 6'6 sweeper and Darilek tells him to back the off.
5'3 referee is intimidated by the ongoings and calls a foul on Ken during the corner kick- The same old boy player backed into Ken who does what any competent keeper does, pushes him out of the way and punches away the corner. Sergio gives them a PK 2-1
Kblische earns the PK back as he gets loose inside of the box and the same guy comes in from behind and lets his push take him down. Pblische converts 2-2
We go to halftime tied 2-2
2nd half begins with 8 fresh bodies starting for the Intl team- all of whom are illegal players
they work the ball around well and their shittiest player hits the blast of his lifetime from 25 out that goes upper 90 far post 3-2
FSFC continue to fight a losing battle, Ken tries to take out a player on a player that gets free in the box and misses him- player falls down Sergio gives another PK 4-2
Intl score on a well hit ball that gets under Ken 5-2
Final 5-2.

Goals: #19 1(4) Pblische 1(7)
Assists: Pblische 1(2) Kblische 1(3)
Allowed: Ken 5(14)
PK Goals: Pblische 1
PK Fouls: Ken 2(3)

Awards

Quote of the Game: Kblische- Tommy decides to hide the $80 ball in his bag and blame it on Raul's kids for stealing the ball- Kblische finally figures out that tommy has the ball and out comes "Look, we just got our asses kicked and I really don't need to be fucking punked right now"

Defensive MVP: Kendall and Darilek- at least 20 plays by these 2 and they forced everything wide

Offensive MVP: Pblische- He was a marked man, took an elbow to the ear, and kept fighting.

Goal of the Game: #19- Anytime this puss scores with his noggin it is like the birth of Jesus

Lineup:

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Jacobs
ST Darilek
SW Kendall
HB Berryman
HB Bobby2
CM Speetey
CM Kblische
F #19
F Pblische

Bench
Coach Tom
Raul
JP
Romo
Tommy DNP

Summer 2008 Vids y Mas 7

2008-09-04T17:56:00.003-05:00

This is how the A&M season opener went

Look out for those homos

Mandatory video for Rusty and Bodo

A keeper that makes Ken look good- (hint not the one that kicks the ball)

Exclusive video of MigJets new girlfriend

This is why Guiness is the bestest beer in the world

Summer 2008 2 Game 6 FSFC 5 SA Sports Fags 2

2008-08-26T00:45:00.007-05:00

August 24.08
Soccer International Complex Field No. 6 MAP and DIRECTIONS
4:30 p.m. SportsLifeSA vs Fading Stars

Game Summary

Potential rainout turns into perfect weather
Kendall calls and says that he has lost 18 lbs and he is no longer the biggest loser and is ready to put his boots back on
4:30 Game and we start with 9 players
Our opponent not only have the worst soccer club name, they actually hold practices
FSFC start off defending and it is evident that once the rest of the team shows up this is a gimme
Pblische gets the fun started with a breakaway that he actually converts 1-0
FSFC miss multiple scoring chances some are good and some are worser
Kendall announces his presence with some authority with breakaway slide tackle- but showed he is not back as the forward got up
Ken gets saved by the crossbar as he is easily beaten on a free kick
Pblische does his dancing with the stars and passes to #19 who puts away goal 2- 2-0
"Fat forward for the SA Sports Fags says "These guys suck, how are we losing to them?'
Halftime 2-0
FnJ goes down with pain 30 seconds into the half after he shanks a ball and gets a beer
Berardo goes down with back pain
Romo goes down b/c he craves the cock
Pblische gets free on breakaway #7, drops the ball to #19 who rips an upper 90 cracker that the goalie makes a hell of a save on- #19 drops the ensuing corner at the back of the six which somehow doesn't result in a goal.
SA Gay life counter attack and the yellow shoes guy beats 3 stabbing defenders and beats Ken with a nice shot 2-1
Pblische gets free on breakaway #9 and deftly cuts back as the defender is sliding and catches Pblisches pinky toe taking him down for the PK- Pblische breaks with tradition and converts 3-1
Pblische gets away on breakaway #14 and scores 4-1
Jacobs throws the ball down inside the right half of the 18 to Berryman who drops it back to #19, #19 beats two defenders and lays it back to Bobby2 who chips the last defender to a wide open Berrybman. Berryman crosses it to the 18 where Kblische dummies the header, ball lands on Pblisches foot and he walks in goal #5 5-1
2 minutes left and Ken is bored with life and angry that the Chinese were allowed to cheat in gymnastics at the Olympics- Ken sees his opportunity at revenge as the chinese guy gets the ball in the penalty area- Ken calls off Kendall and wipes him out at the endline no where near the goal. Ken gets a "yellow" card and gives up the PK. 5-2
The moral of the story is that Ken isn't a racist for thinking all Asians are from the same country, but that Ken is a psychopath that gets bored if he doesn't get to wipe someone out
Final FSFC 5 SA SportsGayLife 2

Goals: Pblische 4(6) #19 1(4)
Assists: Berrybodo 1(1) Kblische 1(4) Pblische 1(3)
Allowed: Ken 2(9)

Yellow Cards: Ken 1(1)

PK Fouls: Ken 1(1)
PK Goals: Pblische 1(1)

Game Awards

Offensive MVP: Pblische- Converting 5 of 17 Breakaways sets new standards

Defensive MVP: 18lbs lighter and still not getting laid Mr. Myke Kendall

Quote of the Game: Tommy- 1. Fake yelling at Pblische for not running the needed 10 yards to receive his crappy pass while the other team has the ball inside the FSFC 18
2. Calling Kens name on a ball he is beaten on
3. Calling Kendalls name on a ball he is beaten on

BeerVP- Sadly there is none

And Finally In honor of the high pitched SportsLife Sweeper that yelled shoot any time the ball was past midfield

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Berryman
FB FnJ
SW Jacobs
ST Darilek
HB Bobby2
HB Jihad
CM #19
CM Pblische

Bench

Kendall
Tommy
Kblische
Raul
Berardo
Romo DNP

Summer 2008 2 Vids y Mas 5

2008-08-22T09:06:00.005-05:00

And here is the Eddie Lewis Head Splitter

Kblische sends this link
Maybe US Gymnast Sacramone could help out the Boxing team

This Olympian tightly grips hard shafts

I think this one won a Gold Medal

8 Days till football and more sip bullshit

Finally, Bodo at the office

Summer 2008 2 Game 5 Storm 6 vs FSFC 1

2008-08-19T23:00:00.003-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 15 MAP and DIRECTIONS

11:00 a.m. Storm vs Fading Stars

Game Summary

Terrible linesman blows the easy offsides call leading to breakaway Storm up 1-0
Terrible linesman blows the easy offsides call leading to a corner kick which FnJ tries to clear and kicks it off the Storm player into the net 2-0
FnJ tries to jump to clear a ball, admits he can't jump as the ball goes over his head right to the Storm forward who scores 3-0
Shitty ref allows the Storms wall to catch the ball inside the box on a free kick
Halftime
4-0
5-0
6-0
6-1

Can't bitch about the effort from those that attended the game

Assists Kblische 1(3)
Allowed Ken 6(7)

Yellow: #19- should have had 3 when openly saying that the chicano ref was high- which he was

Quote of the Game: #19 "Hey Jihad, I can't believe these army guys haven't killed you yet" Tommy "He's not ticking"

BeerVP- Ken- Dropping a benjamin at that shit tastic bar known as Fatso's-

Summer 2008 2 Vids y Mas 4

2008-08-15T10:22:00.002-05:00

4 MORE YEARS!

TRex performs at the olympics

Cheerleaders at a football match?

Barnes submits a video called "Sparkling Wiggles"

Pictures from Georgia vs Russia

Summer 2008 2 Game 4 FSFC 7 vs Havoc 0

2008-08-10T21:15:00.004-05:00

Sunday August 10, 2008 NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 18

11:00 a.m. Havoc vs Fading Stars

Game Summary

#19 scores the game winner 15 minutes as Jihad heads the ball down at the edge of the circle and #19 hits a cracker 1-0
Jihad taps in a cross from Raul 2-0
#19 deflects a wayward shot into the net 3-0
Kblische scores from 40 yards out on an empty net 4-0
Halftime
MigJet gets a new nickname and now will be known as Migs- Think the Silence of the the Lambs goo tosser
Bodo gets off a cross that somehow makes its way to Raul who pops his cherry 5-0
Berrybodo scores but was offsides
Kblische dribbles around the doofus keeper and tucks the ball into the side netting 6-0
Jihad scores again 7-0

Goals: #19 2(3) Jihad 2(3) Kblische 2(9) Raul 1(1)
Assts: JP 1(1) Bodo 1(1) Jihad 1(1) Raul 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 0(1)

Goat of the Game: FnJ- Traps a ball that was intended for Migs and ignores the 5 people yelling leave, then commences to shank the shot

Goal of the Game: #19's beautiful left footed blast that is the game winner

Churchill Post of the Game: Bodo- Places a wide open header neatly onto the post

Not much else as this was a wipeout-

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Tommy
FB FnJ
SW Bobby2
ST Darilek
HB JP
HB BerryBodo
CM #19
CM Romo
F Bodo
F Jihad

Bench

Kblische
Raul
Migs
JimmyShinGuards

Summer 2008 2 Vids 3

2008-08-08T11:39:00.004-05:00

Fun with the Wii

Big ass snake

20 Days till college football

Bob Saget Joke NSFW

Summer 2008 Game 3 FSFC 5 Gay Blades 4

2008-08-03T23:27:00.003-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 20 MAP and DIRECTIONS

9:00 a.m. Blades FC vs Fading Stars

Game Summary

#19 did some snooping on the intertron and found the game report on the Gay Blades Website
hey dumbasses click on the link

Goals: Kblische 3(7) Pblische 2(2)
Assts: Kblische 1(2) Pblische 2(2)
Allowed: Berryman 4(4)
PK Fouls: Bergman 2(3)

Awards Section

Goal of the Game: Kblische chips the ball down the left side to Pblische who was heavily guarded by Fat Guy, Pblische takes it to the end line, sends it near post where Kblische backheels the ball past the stoned keeper

Offensive MVP: Pblische- pretty good output for a such a shitty player 2 goals 2 assists

Defensive MVP: Darilek- Covered up quite a few mistakes by fullbacks and even more by the lazy halfbacks

Bender Hustle POG: Bobby2 - Misses a PK, misses the follow up, misses a breakaway- no big deal when you bust your ass up and down the pitch like him

Goat of the Game: Bergman- 2 PK Fouls- The Chicken Wing defense is only acceptable at Hooters when Berryman tries to eat all the drummies

Pussy of the Game: Fat Guy- Not only did he do absolutely nothing on the field, his fucking cheap shot on #19 was pathetic- Guess what fat boy, it didn't hurt and you talking shit while walking off the pitch in shame just proves you are a typical cunt Brit that would be speaking fucking German if it wasn't for us. So next time you order another supersized Double quarter pounder with cheese meal in between your pizza deliveries, remember that you are not all alone because you can't find your dick underneath your fat, it is b/c you are an asshole.

Lineup

GK Berryman
FB PK Bergman
FB FnJ
SW Jacobs
ST Darilek
HB Bodo
HB JP
CM Romo
CM Bobby
F #19
F Jihad

Bench
Coach Migjet
Raul
Tommy
Kblische
Pblische

Summer 2 2008 Vids 2

2008-07-31T12:47:00.006-05:00

MigJet's Penis Restraunt

My ankle hurts

30 days till Football Season

Summer of Kneals Episode 1

Funny Videos | Funny Cartoons | More Video Clips

Fading Stars Executive Commitee

2008-07-28T23:22:00.008-05:00

Due to recent attendance problems and the pending number of players wanting to play in for the coming Fall Season. the Executive Committee of the Fading Stars held a formal meeting at Hooters on Sunday.

Here are the results

Don- MigJet

Consigliere - #19

Underboss-Darilek

Capo- Kblische

Luca Brasi/Hatchet Man Capo- Berardo

Gout Capo- FnJ

We have 11 people signed up for Summer 2 season and 2 of those are out with injuries- Players have requested tryouts with the Fading Stars and they have been granted and will play this summer- Determination on their status for the fall is pending.

Currently we have about 25 people on the potential roster for the fall and that is probably 8 too many. Attendance over the last 10 seasons will be a major factor as will playing ability in any decisions that will have to be made by the boss in determination of the Fall Roster.

Additionally, Underboss Darilek will be sending out a team text every week letting you fucks know of the game time and location.

Also, Capo Kblische will be in charge of new uniforms for the fall season- You no buy uniform you go play somewhere else. You wear yellow fucking shorts, you play somewhere else.

Please pay your fees as you really don't want the Hatchet Man paying you a visit- Just ask Freddy BackHeels.

Summer 2008 2 Game 2 FSFC vs 2 Black dudes and 7 Mexicans aka Zorros

2008-07-27T16:30:00.006-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 10 MAP and DIRECTIONS

9:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs 2 Black dudes 7 Mexicans

#19 forgot to bring important things like shoes, socks and those things that protect your shins
MigJet made player #7 so the game could start
2 Black guys score on Tommy- Wasson thinks goals count as 2
#19 arrives to make it 8 players and finds a team with gimpy Romo and Migjet playing stopper
Kblische player 9, finally shakes off bondage from the German and arrives 24 minutes into play and evens the sides
#19 and Jihad combine for a steal on the opponents end, #19 is free and clear at the 18, fakes a shot and passes to Kblische who scores on his first touch of the game
FSFC 1 2 Black guys 1
Kblische gets a steal off of the goal kick, dribbles five yards and hits a scorching low shot that bounces right under the shitty keeper
FSFC 2 Bunch of Zorros 1
#19 hits a cracker that bounces right under the shitty keeper
FSFC 3 Two black guys and a baby 1
Bergman, who clearly owns KFC stock, sticks out his fucking chicken wing and gives up a PK
FSFC 3 Obama's Minions 2 Halftime

2nd Half
#19 hears Jihad whisper and deftly sends a 30 yard ball that hits Jihad in the chest at the 18, Jihad big boys his way thru the last defender and beats the keeper
FSFC 4 Rainbow Coalition 2
Kblische slaps a free kick with his purse and misses wide
Kblische redeems herself on the next free kick as the wall sets up in the middle and he places the ball nicely in the net
FSFC 5 He who should not be named 2
Migjet and Romo are still alive
How the Fuck did we tie the blades who lost to this team 5-0?

Final FSFC 5 Zorros 2

Goals: Kblische 3(4) #19 1(2) Jihad 1(1)
Assts: #19 2(2) Kblische 1(1)
Allowed: Tommy 2(2)

Offensive MVP- Kblische- Hat trick and an assist = winner

Defensive MVP- Tommy- Stuck in the goal, Tommy stuffs a breakaway and does the Rocky pose

Game MVP- Migjet- 80+ minutes and outran Romo

BeerVP- Darilek-

Lineup

GK Tommy
FB Bergman
FB JP
SW Darilek
ST MigJet
HB Jihad
CM Romo

Bench

#19
Kblische
Bobby2

Summer 2008 2 Vids y Mas 1

2008-07-24T10:38:00.004-05:00

Darth Golfer

Speetey Berardo is on Vacation in Cabo till August 17th

Got me a big wave

A funny frog

Who the hell is this guy?

Parenting at its finest

More Parenting Gold

Summer 2008 Game 1 FSFC 1 Global Stars 1

2008-07-13T23:15:00.003-05:00

NEYSO Specht Rd. Complex Field No. 9 MAP and DIRECTIONS

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs Global Stars

#19 was busy saving the soul of #19 Jr so only 17 minutes of the game were witnessed
Kblische is now married, Kendall won't play till he loses 20 lbs and FnJ has set 18th Century medicine back a decade
allegedly Kblische scores on a free kick whilst the other team was screwing around with the wall
Jihad misses a bunny from 6 yards out
rusty clears a free kick at the opponents 18
3 defenders stab at the ball like it was the last beenie weenie at Kblisches party and leave Ken out to dry to get scored on by the douchebag wearing headgear
Final FSFC 1 Global Stars 1
Everyone please remember how much shit these taint lickers talked on the sideline about how they whipped our asses
Raquetball man got contacts and beat JP 1 v 1

Goals Kblische 1(1)
Allowed Ken 1(1)

No awards unless someone that saw the game wants to add something, and no one broughted the beer

Attendees

GK Ken
Bergman
Tommy
Migjet
Speetey
Rusty
Jihad
Bobby2
Romo
Kneals
JP
Kblische
Pblische
Blische3
#19

Fading Stars FC Look Alike Contest 6

2008-07-07T16:32:00.004-05:00

1. Merrill Hoge- Former NFL Running Back

2. Howie Long- Star of Firestorm
3. Brian Howe- Star of Pursuit of Happyness

4. Kiefer Sutherland- Star of Flatliners
5. Gary Busey- Star of Under Siege

6. BONUS- Deco- Think Iraq and Hooters

Summer 2008 1 Game 10 FSFC 3 NB United 1

2008-06-29T22:40:00.005-05:00

Soccer International Complex Field No.12 MAP

11:00 a.m. Fading Stars vs News Braunsfels United

Sunday June 29

Game Summary

Another game in temperatures hotter than a video of Berryman making love to a real doll
MigJet makes his return to the starting lineup at Stopper against a team of flat bellies
Game starts and it is apparent that the opponent is younger, skinnier, and thankfully they learned to play in News Braunsfels
Packing the middle and letting the kids shoot from outside the 18 is the game plan
FSFC get a counter attack and put the ball to Rusty's foot who misses wide left
FSFC continue to just let the numbskulls dribble around and shoot nubbers at the net
Kblische takes a goal kick, puts in on Rustys shiny head who flicks it forward to a streaking Pblische- Pblische beats the sweeper and gently tucks the ball into the back of the net FSFC 1 Flat Bellies United 0
The defensive strategy works until the last minute of the half, when Bergman and FnJ are unable to clear the ball from the kid with Shitlocks- Bergman toe pokes the ball to the other team at the top of the 18 and the kid takes a good shot that beats Ken
FSFC 1 News Braunsfels 1 Halftime
Suprisingly, the second half becomes a display of smart soccer and believe it or not superior fitness for... wait for it, The Fading Stars
#19 makes a defensive pick at the 18 and plays the ball up the left half to Bobby 2 at midfield. Bobby2 gets the ball to Pblische who dicks around with the ball and eventually works it to NB 18 where he finds a wide open Bobby2 who easily beats the keeper 1v1
FSFC 2 No Bellies United 1
The FSFC rope a dope keeps the kids on end as there shots miss so bad, Ken is getting tired chasing the ball into the weeds
FSFC work the ball back into the NB box and this time the Pirate makes his presence felt- the ball is bouncing around inside the 6 and instead of trying to get the ball, the keeper just shoves the Pirate off of the plank- The pirate goes down hard and lets out a big "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!"
PK is awarded- and here is where it gets fun Kblische wants FnJ to take the kick so that Pblische doesn't pass him for the golden boot- Pblische offers the kick to #19 which would have created a 3 way tie for the golden boot- Well in the interest of the team and not wanting the goat award, #19 tells Pblische to take the kick. Pblische makes the kick
FSFC 3 Nubian Buttbuddies 1
FSFC run out the clock and Kblische blows his chance to tie Pblische in the last 5 minutes
FSFC 3 NB United 1 FINAL

Goals: Pblische 2(8) Bobby 2 1(1)
Assts : Kblische 1(5) Rusty 1(3) Pblische 1(2)

Allowed: Ken 1(20)

Quote of the Game- JP "Could you please mention on the Blog that I had my best game for the Fading Stars b/c I sat out and played cheerleader"

Bender POG- Romo- despite shanking 2 gimme goals, the fact he even got to those balls with 2 knee braces and running slower than Migjet is impressive

Offensive MVP- Pblische- 2 goals and 1 assist

Defensive MVP- Ken- sat on the line and made the neccessary saves on the long shots

Pussy of the Game- Ken- never even came close to knocking a forward on his ass

Goal of the Game- Bobby 2's Game Winner- great build up and even better finish

Lineup

GK Ken
FB FnJ
FB Bergman
ST Migjet
SW Kblische
CM #19
CM Pblische
HB Bobby 2
HB Bodo
F Rusty
F Romo

Bench

Tommy
Jihad
Tha Pirate
JP

Summer 2008 Lynks y Mas 10

2008-06-26T16:00:00.004-05:00

Thats my Granny

New Presidential Candidate

Wimbledon is back

Berrybodo sent me this link

The french can shoot

I love skaters

Broken Skateboard Has Last Laugh - Watch more free videos

Summer 2008 Game 9 FSFC 1 Gay Blades 2

2008-06-23T09:34:00.002-05:00

NEYSO Specht Road Complex Field No.20 MAP

9:00 a.m. Blades FC vs Fading Stars

Gay Blades Late Penetration send FSFC Packing
June 22,2008

5 minutes in Gay Blades get a free kick outside of the box, the cross finds big Dougie wide open at the 6- His header is clearly wide and not a problem- Trouble is that Tiger Dougie put some how spins the ball off of a pile of dirt that bounces into the net Gay Blades lead 1-0
FSFC get control of the game, thanks to the Blades strategy of playing the long ball on every single possesion
Berardo gets into a tussle with the lorenzo llamas wannabe and gets in a good shove
Kneal gives Lorenzo a shove from behind earning a yellow card
#19 steals a ball just outside the 18 and rips a cracker that misses by a foot
Super sub Bobby 2 gets into the game and starts pounding the box with long crosses barely missing connecting twice
Can someone, anyone explain to me the ball playing the hand rule?
Inside the 18 the ball bounces up into #19's arm, who then turns and scores Handball Called Yet Berardo plays a ball at midfiled that a Blades player knocks down with his hand and "steals" the ball? Same play
FSFC trail the Blades 1-0 half
FSFC start to dominate the game getting plenty of opportunities and shots
20 minutes to go, FnJ plays a sky ball that Martin loses in the sun around midfield- #19 chases down the ball dribbles to the circle outside of the 18 and unleashes a furious left footer that rips the upper 90 side netting FSFC 1 Gay Blades 1
5 minutes left the Blades make a push- Martin gets a shot blocked and the ball caroms to the Blades sweeper outside the 18 who hits a solid shot that beats Ken 2-1
FSFC get a late header from Speetey but he can't put it on frame
FSFC 1 Gay Blades 2

Goals #19 1(6)
Assists FnJ 1(3)

Yellow Kneals 1(1)

Foul of the Game: Berardo with a nice shove on Lorenzo

Tackle of the Game: Ken- another game another decapitated forward

Goal of the Game: not a real tough choice- but this is what it looked like only left footed

BeerVP- Kneals bringing leftover Bud Light for us to enjoy

Bender Hustle Player of the Game: Super Sub Bobby 2

Pussy of the Game: The Blische Brothers- going to church on sunday is only ok if you are getting the spicy fried chicken

Lineup

GK Ken
FB FnJ
FB Tommy
ST Darilek
SW Bergman
HB Jihad
HB Bodo
CM Kneals
CM Speetey
F #19
F Rusty

Bench
Romo IR
Lilly
Bobby 2
JP

Summer 2008 Links y Mas 9

2008-06-20T09:37:00.002-05:00

Ballack's disgusting strike

Classic Vid- Migjet's First marriage gets off to a good start

So this is what you old bastards whacked off to in the day

Rap Fights

Iraqi GangstA

We knew Obama was a crackhead, but getting blowjobs from dudes?

Bender King 2002-June 16 2008

2008-06-17T23:23:00.003-05:00

There will be a new game award in honor of this bad ass dog- It will be the hustle award- given to the player that refuses to give up.

A few Bender Highlights

Attended 5 Cinco de Mayo parties and had the shits for 5 straight years
Took a chunk out of the shady UPS drivers arm
Kicked Berryman out of his bed every time #19 was out of town
Threw a rat found in the pantry 15 feet into a wall then killing him properly

RIP Bender

Summer 2008 Game 8 FSFC 3 Real Azteca 4

2008-06-15T21:38:00.002-05:00

Goals Rusty 1(5) #19 2(5)
Assists Rusty 1(2) Darilek 2(2)
Allowed Ken 4(17)

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Tommy
FB Chin
SW Bergman
ST Darilek
HB JP
HB Bobby 2
CM Speetey
CM #19
F Rusty
F Jihad

Bench
Bodo

Summer 2008 Vids Ocho

2008-06-13T11:54:00.003-05:00

Wonder if Obama is like this brother

Finally an REM song that is good

Fatty rides a bull

Berryman buys a Dell

Summer 2008 Game 7 FSFC 7 Traditionals 5

2008-06-09T16:40:00.003-05:00

PEPSI/SIC #8 @4:30
It was fucking hot
FSFC fall down 3-0
Handball in the box bails out the FSFC and Fnj shoots it down the middle 3-1
Defense plays more olay 4-1 Halftime
Gary presents the FSFC with its Spring Championship Trophy and Medals
Kblische picks off a pass dribbles and shoots from 25 and beats the keeper- 4-2
Bodo and Bergman both chase the ball leaving the forward wide open at the 18 who beats Ken far post 5-2
Pissed off, Pblische runs a post down the left hash and #19 down the right- Kblische chunks up the hail mary that pat catches at 12, jukes the defender, jukes the safety and walks into the end zone 5-3
Kblische gets free and puts it in the net 5-4
Jacobs gets a header off of a cross that is heading into the net, corner that is headed into the net, FnJ blocks the ball and it drops to Romo who slots it in for the tie 5-5
Ball gets worked around the box and FnJ passes and finds Bobby1 wide ass open in the box and puts away the go ahead goal 6-5
Kblische hits a goal kick that caroms off of some people right to Pblische who passes to a wide open Bobby for the easy finish 7-5
FSFC 7 Traditionals 5

Summer Vids y Mas 7

2008-06-06T13:24:00.002-05:00

Baseball Fight

This really ruined my fishing self esteem

Tommy shows his love for Ken

Top 10 Fading Star Shanks

Irish Jackass

Summer 2008 Vids y Mas 6

2008-05-30T13:08:00.002-05:00

Work Safety is important

fun with the Wii

Berryman Works out

The Bootyful Game

Acrobatic Goals

Kobe is a Jackass

One of these things is not like the other-

2008-05-12T21:47:00.006-05:00

Lets see if you can spot the differences in these two pictures of the same soccer team called the HFA Moyas

The official Moya team picture from the HFA Website...

The team we played in the tourney

Someone served alcohol to minors...

and where did all the brothers go

Cinco de Mayo 2008 Tournament Summary

2008-05-05T13:38:00.014-05:00

**notice how Lil Payne fucks up the picture by standing up**

Game 1 FSFC vs Anteaters 2 8:00

Holy shit, we had eleven bodies ready to play at 8:00 am
Nate gives up a really really soft PK 5 minutes into the match, however #19 distracts the shooter by calling him a fat boy, and Ken eats up the shot.
PBlische puts the ball to a wide open Romo's foot at the 12 and Romo's deftly strikes the ball straight up into the air, the ump calls infield fly, but our friend Opie is in net and the ball floats towards the goal, he drops the ball, tries to catch it again and knocks it into the net. FSFC 1 Ants 0
Game flows well and the FSFC are impersonating a good soccer team
Paul gets a ball in the box dribbles around for a bit, and passes the ball easily into then net
FSFC 2 Ants 0 Halftime
Highlight of halftime is Nate learning that our old buddy Opie and his purple flowered keepers shirt is in the net
KBlische puts this one away early in the 2nd half as he dribbles thru a couple and puts his shot into the side netting
FSFC 3 Ants 0
Berrybodo goes in at forward-
Give up a really soft goal as the clock expires
FSFC 3 Ants 1 Final

Goals: Romo 1(1) Paul 1(1) Kblische 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 1(1)

GAME 2 FSFC vs NPTSA Guiness 11:00

This game was over when Raquetball Man began warming
Minutes in, Lance puts a ball right on Romo's head who bangs home the header 1-0
Trex misses from the 6
Kblische comes up from FB to show Trex how to shoot and rolls one past the keeper 2-0
Lance dribbles free and gets 1v1 with Raquetball man, flips it over his head, trots past him and slots his shot past the keeper. Lance would later express feelings of guilt and remorse for abusing the Raquetball man. 3-0
Lance gets loose in the box and beats two players takes it down to the endline, crosses the ball off of Berrymans foot and into the net- 4-0*
Halftime 4-0 and Migjet is suiting up
Pblische makes his first appearance and tops it off by beating the keeper with a back heel 5-0
Complete line change for the final 20 minutes- Migjet gets significant PT
Kendall finally gets a header to go in 6-0
Final FSFC 6 NPTSA Guiness 0
0 Shots on goal

Goals: Romo 1(2) Lance 2(2) Kblische 1(2) Pblische 1(1) Kendall 1(1)

Game 3 FSFC vs HFA Kingwood FC

Game 3 and the FSFC need to lose by 3 or face the prospect of advancing to Sunday
The Anteaters gather around our field to cheer on the opponents, taunting the FSFC with their beer
The Kingwood Futbol Cunts begin their pissing and moaning from the first whistle
Pblische gets the scoring started early as he corrals a lose ball and hits a rocket from 25 that scalds the net FSFC 1 Futbol Cunts 0
Prince valium gets absolutely lambasted in the box as he goes up for a header in the box against Barnes, Nate and #19- then loses his mind yelling at the ref.
Lance gets a breakaway and puts the metal to the pedal and scores a goal by shooting it off of Berryman once again 2-0
Prince Valium delays the game for 5 minutes after getting a card and being asked to not return to the pitch
2-0 Halftime- Ref is upset that the Anteaters are rooting against the Fading Stars and taunting every play
The Fading Stars put i tin cruise control for the second half as unfortunately a Sunday appearance seems eminent
Lance crushes a free kick from the 22 out that easily beats the keeper 3-0
Barnes gets tangled up with a puerto rican, and is lucky to escape a saturday afternoon knife fight. PR gets tossed when he calls Barnes overweight
Fading Stars 3 Houston Tittie Babies 0

Goals: Pblische 1(2) Lance 2(4)

Cinco Cinco De Mayo Mudbug Massacre 2008

80lbs of mudbugs dead and eaten
40lbs of ribs dead and eaten
1 Keg of shiner dead and bloated
German chick drinks her blueberry beer
Barnes leaves early with a pouty face
Spurs get annihilated
Lance almost walks into the spa
19's 10 year old nephew Cody out eats lasts years Mudbug champion
#19 Jr eats a piece of corn that may have been a little bit spicy, and child protective services are notified
Some other team invades the party, but are excused b/c they showed some leg
Next year we will add a keg of water to the menu

Semi-Finals FSFC vs SASA Rayados 8:30

Who was the asshole that thought it was a good idea to have a party the night before?
Rumour has it that someone puked before in a nearby field before game time
Rumour has it that when eating mudbugs, you should wash your hands before pissing
Just before kickoff, Nate relays a story of a certain player puking pre-game and having remnants of beef ribs in his beard while warming up. Kendall proceeds to have a nice dry heave
TRex washes away the shanks from his jersey
Game gets off to a really slow start, as everyone is really hurting and no one wants to run with the ball.
TRex gets lose on a ball and pounds it in the back of the net 1-0
Fading Stars win a corner kick and Paul crosses a beauty that Kendall goes old school on and rips the header past the helpless keeper 2-0
Ken pulls a Ken and absolutely destroys the Rayados player on a breakaway, but the guy gets the shot off and Nate clears it off of the endline. Would have been defensive play of the tournament, except for the PK that was awarded. This time the PK is successful 2-1
Halftime
2nd half begins as does the Pblische breakaway missed shot fest
Barnes shanks a pass in the back that pops up in the air and heads towards the box, Nate goes up to clear, gets wiped out by the Rayados player and somehow the ball caroms into the net 2-2
TRex gets back on the board with a blast from inside the 18 3-2
Barnes decides to takeout the flag post, permanently disabling it
Ball gets worked up the left side of the Rayados half, Paul brings it up to the 18 doesn't like what he sees, pulls the ball out to restart the offense. Paul passes it to #19 who swings it to the middle to Kblische, Kblische hits Pblische on a run to the right. Pblische brings it down the right side and crosses to the 6 where #19 flys in from the PK spot to knock it home 4-2
FSFC run out the clock and have a birth in the finals

Goals: TRex 2(2) Kendall 1(2) #19 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 2(3)
The Finals FSFC vs HFA Moya

Fading Stars ask the game to be moved to next week
Fans, we got fans
Looks like 4 games, gluttoney and unabaited alcohol abuse have finally taken its toll on the bodies of the Fading Stars causing everyone to be about 3 steps slower
Opening minutes, #19 steals a ball on the Moya's end line, dribbles into the box and passes to a wide open TRex who hammers a shot right at the keeper
The Moyas begin to use their youth and attack in droves- Ken staves off the first attacks until one of the slippery fuckers gets free in the middle and cracks a shot from 25 yards out that hits side netting. 0-1
Paul hits a free kick from about 20- ball bounces off the wall, #19 gets a touch on it that deflects to Romo who shanks the open shot
Ryan/Kneals runs to the ball clears it and knocks the shit out of a little guy- Kneals picks up a yellow for calling it a shitty call
Moyas bring it down the right side, #19 makes the defensive tackle but the ball pops free to the player who then takes on Lance and loses only to have the ball pop free again, then he crosses to the six where the ball is somehow shouldered into the net 0-2
Lance chases down a ball and knocks it off the defender winning the corner kick- Lance plays it to Romo at the top of the box ball gets knocked around, Paul chases it down beats the defender and beats the keeper. Fading stars finally on the board 1-2
Halftime
Fading Stars start to put it together and begin to control tempo and pretty much stonewall their offense
Several good opportunities arise, but the ball doesn't want to go in the net
With about 20 minutes left in the game, Bergman commits a very questionable foul in the box resulting in a PK. Ken saves the PK but the rebound goes right to the shooter who scores it. 1-3
With 5 minutes left, FnJ the Human Victory Cigar enters the game, ending all hope of a championship
Final FSFC 1 HFA Moya 3

Goals Paul 1(2)
Allowed Ken 3(5)
Yellow Cards - Barnes 1(1) Kneal 1(1) Kendall 1(1)

Tournament Stats and Awards

Goals
Lance 4
Kblische 2
TRex 2
Romo 2
Paul 2
Pblische 2
Kendall 2
#19 1

Allowed
Ken 6
2 Shutouts
2 PK saves

PK Fouls
Nate 1
Ken 1
Bergman 1

Yellow Cards
Barnes 1 for #19 pushing a player
Kneals 1 for telling the ref he is full of shit
Kendall 1 for destroying a Moya on the sideline

Quotes of Note

When discussing the prospect of PK shootouts- Lance delivers this bomb "Well we better sub out Hunter then"

When warming up for the 2nd game, Paul delivers the "when I was wiping my ass this morning I got a little terd under my nail"

Nate speaking to Kendall- " #19 puked in the bushes over their, and when he came to warm up he had puke in his beard- Kendall "Stop, oh god bllllllhhh"

When #19 Jr arrives at the pitch and cries when running to #19- Berryman Quips "I would cry too if that were my daddy"

Offensive MVPs- Lance and Paul- 6 combined goals and probably 5 assists - Hard to pick between the two as they changed the offense

Defensive MVP- Nate- Other than the PK in the first 5 minutes, Nater controlled the back half of the pitch

Foul of the Tourney- Kendall- Late in the Finals, a tired Kendall decides to get his moneys worth and tees off on a player just like the old days

Churchill Post of the Tourney- Only 1- Lance flicks a header that decides its resting place was not the net but instead the post

Newcomer of the Tourney- Ryan/Kneals- starting to play more and more like Nate

Crawfish MVP- some wanted Trex's brother to win, but the award is more about heart than stomach. Awhite is the winner for showing up @ 12:00 to polish off the last of em after spending the night at the hospital.

Churchill Flag Girl of the Tourney- Barnes- I don't think I have ever seen metal bend like that before

Goat of the Tourney- Age

Pussy of the Tourney- Pblische- Skipping the finals to play/finish 2nd in the girls tourney. Could have been a hero, could have been a hero.

Goal of the Tourney- #19's- did you really think I was going to write all of this shit and not mark out to myself?

Special Thanks to
Migjet for coaching us to our first finals berth
Lance and Paul for spending their weekend playing with a bunch of hacks
Barnes for returning from shitty Dallas for the tourney and Betsy for making him actually run in preparation
#19's Wife for letting her house get used for the Mudbug Massacre
Kendall- for conning Lance and Paul into thinking that we are a good team
Nater and Ryan- for packing the stands and the goal box
Girl in the sports bra- thanks
Alex from Budweiser for donating 7 cases of beer
Walldog and future mrs walldog for flying in from Dallas to eat dem mudbugs
TRex's Mom for getting us those beautiful shirts for cheap
The lock on my bathroom door, had it worked Ken would have gotten a blow job in the sanctity of my home

and finally to Carlos and Gary for putting on a hell of a tourney

See you cock smokers next year

Cinco Cinco de Mayo Mudbug Massacre 2008 Preview

2008-04-29T11:03:00.006-05:00

This years theme song

Schedule

Friday May 2nd

Team captain meeting and free beer at the Holiday Inn 6-10

Saturday May 3rd

Game 1 FSFC vs SASA Anteaters 8 am Specht 18
Game 2 FSFC vs NTPSA Guiness 11 am Specht 13
Game 3 FSFC vs HFC Kingwood 3:30 pm Specht 17

Cinco Cinco de Mayo Mudbug Massacre

#19's Casa- 6 PM

Menu
80 lbs of Mudbugs
50lbs of Taters
Plenty o corn
40 lbs of ribs
Gourmet Pigs in a Blanket
5 lbs Chix Fajitas
Beer
More Beer

Spurs vs Hornets @ 9 pm

Sunday May 4th

Semifinals Specht 8:30
Finals Specht 12:30

Roster, #, Games Available

#19 1,2,3 PAID
Kendal #21 1,2,3 PAID
Darilek #6 1,2,3 PAID
Barnes #17 1,2,3 PAID
Romo #15 1,2,3 PAID
Bergman #12 1,2,3 PAID
Ken #1 1,2,3 PAID
MigJet #5 1 PAID
Kblsiche #23 1,2,3 PAID
Kneals #7 O Paid
AWhite #11 1,2,3 PAID
Jihad #18 1,2,3
BerryBodo #2 1,2,3
Pblsiche #16 2,3
TRex #3 1,2,3
Rusty #8 2,3
Nate #13 1,2,3

Summer 2008 Game 4 FSFC 2 Real Azteca 4

2008-04-28T11:37:00.003-05:00

Soccer International Complex Field No. 8
9:00 a.m. Real Azteca vs Fading Stars
Sunday April 27, 2008

Quick Notes

MigJet makes his first start in quite a while
Ken's shutout streak ends
Migjet drowns a roach in some beer
Injury Free for Cinco de Mayo

Game Summary

Windy day, makes for tough soccer but we get the wind in the first half
Good start to the game considering our both of our center midfielders have grey hair and use viagra weekly.
Fading Stars get on the board when Romo hits a cracka from 25 that drops down just under the crossbar easily beating the keeper
FSFC 1 Real Azteca 0
JP hacks the shit out of the Gato, injuring the pussy cat and ending his afternoon
Ken hits a big punt that caroms off of a defender and makes its way to Pblische who chips the keeper for an easy goal
FSFC 2 Real Azteca 0
and here is where the game is lost...
Pblische dribbles like mad and crosses to the 6 on the foot of Pblische who blasts the empty netter 15 feet over the goal
Rusty gets a shot off that the keeper parries away right to Pblische who never gets off a shot
the Aztecas play a ball into the box and Ken incorrectly comes out as the ball hung up in the wind and died. Ken then whacks the shit out of the player while clearing the ball, no call. Then Bergman runs over to defend, minimal contact and a PK is rewarded. Ken dives the wrong way on the kick.
FSFC 2 Real Azteca 1 Halftime
The wind picks up by about 10 mphs making it difficult to play
FSFC get off a good attack and PBlische rips a shot off of the chest of the keeper making him fall down in pain
Real Aztecas play a long ball down the middle, Kblische yells a Rusty to get the ball, Rusty stops instead, their defender runs on to the ball and easily beats Ken for the goal. Communication Failure 1
FSFC 2 Real Azteca 2
Game is even from here on out until... Real Azteca chip a ball into the box between Pblische and Ken- neither one calls for the ball and both stop running at the ball. The Azteca player beats both to the ball and scores a really really shitty goal
FSFC 2 Real Azteca 3
And just in case you thought that goal was shitty, theres more
Real Azteca then get the ball in the box, pass it around the box like it was practice and it essentially was b/c there was no defender even in the box
FSFC 2 Real Azteca 4
Bad Goals, Bad attendance, bad outcome. But other than that it was a perfect game

Goals: Romo 1(1) Pblische 1(5)
Assists: Ken 1(2)
Allowed: Ken 4(4)

Yellow Cards: JP 1(1) Pblische 1(1) Rusty 1(1)

Goal of the Game: Romo with a cracka

Hack of the Game: JP- chasing down the Gato and wacking him ending the Gatos day

Offensive MVP: 2 Goals should have been 5 no stars today

Goat of the Game: Communication Failures between Kblische/Rusty, Pblische/Ken and Ken/Bergman result in 3 soft goals

Defensive MVP: 4 truly soft goals, piss poor communcation, shameful performance

Hooters MVP: Migjet- A little baby roach falls from the ceiling landing on the Texas table right in front of Migjet- Migjet knocks it to the ground and squishes it with his foot. We have a full pitcher of beer, and it is determined that the best beer is free beer. Calmly we drink the pitcher till it gets down to about half a beer.

Migjet puts the roach in the pitcher, calls over the waitress and says "what the fuck is this in my beer?"

And that is how we got a free pitcher of beer

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Tommy
SW Kblische
ST Darilek
HB JP
HB Rusty
CM Romo
CM MigJet
F #19
F Pblische

Bench
Bobby 2
Bobby Ewing
Awhite

Summer 2008 Vids y Mas 4

2008-04-25T10:01:00.003-05:00

209 Straight 3 pointers

Abortion Man

World's Greatest Drummer

Someone Pranks Duncan

Berryman Goes Moose Hunting

My Tissue Queen is a cubs fan

Finally, A Dallas Mavs Tribute video

More videos from the "ryanparkersongs's channel" channel at Heavy.com

Summer 2008 Game 3 FSFC 2 Gak Juice 0

2008-04-14T13:07:00.003-05:00

Sunday April 13 2008
9am Specht 12
FSFC vs Gak Juice

Forced to wear ugly ass orange Pennies against the team that wears the US Natl Team Kit
Berrybodo delays the game b/c he can't find a penny to fit over his big fat man tits and belly. He looked like he was wearing a sports bra as all it covered was his tits. He looked like stuffed sausage- Tough to start a game when your sweeper is rolling around on the ground b/c he is laughing so hard
2 minutes into the game the dipshit soon to be known as All Day decides to head #19 in the head instead of the ball-
#19 is forced to leave the pitch bleeding profusely- Rusty gets out some super glue and glues up #19's melon
Everyone plays much much better than last week
Awhite shows up just in time to watch Ken destroy All Day on a breakaway telling him to stay the hell out of my box while he is laying on the ground
Nobody on their team came within 10 yards of Ken for the rest of the game
Bodo is welcomed back by dribbling his breakaway right into the last defender instead of passing to a wide open Rusty
Halftime 0-0
Fading Stars are going into the wind for the second half
Berardo gets control near midfield, #19 holds off a defender and finds Kblische in the middle of the pitch. Kblische puts it on cruise control and dribbles all the way to the 18 where he deftly places the ball to the left of the keeper and into the net
FSFC 1 Gak Juice 0
The stellar defense continues and decent ball control and passing all across the pitch
Darilek stuffs Arturo denying him his scholarship to North Carolina. Darilek sends a ball to Bodo on the left half of the 18- Bodo passes to #19 who turns and crosses the ball to Rusty. Rusty makes the chest trap and hits the bouncing ball with some nasty mojo. The shot easily beats the keeper
FSFC 2 Gak Juice 0
20 Minutes left and the FSFC don't even give up a real scoring chance and hang on for the solid win over a bunch of flat bellies

Goals: Kblische 1(1) Rusty 1(2)
Assist: #19 2(2) Bodo 1(1)
Allowed: Ken 0(0)

Offensive MVP: Rusty- not only for scoring a spectacular goal, but for gluing up #19's melon

Defensive MVP: Jacobs, Darilek Bergman etc- Per your goalkeeper "Either Burg or the entire D needs to get defensive MVP for yesterday. Those fuckers frustrated the hell out of our african-american friends…"

Quote of the Game: Jacobs- All Day- All Day takes a shot that misses by 40 yards and Jacobs quips- "ALL DAY! Gonna call you AD, b/c we are going to let you shoot All Day"

Tackle of the Game: Ken- his absolute destruction of All Day on the break away

Goal of the Game: Rusty with his trap and upper 90 finish

Lineup
GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Tommy
SW Jacobs
ST Darilek
HB BerryBodo
HB JP
CM Romo
CM Berardo
F #19
F Bobby

Bench
Rusty
Awhite
Kblische
Migjet
Bodo

Summer 2008 Vids y Mas 3

2008-04-11T12:41:00.005-05:00

Pblische has a new team

Kid Bush

Beer Pouring Fun

Rap Off

Lisa Lampenelli Roasts

Artie Lang Part 1 The Set-Up

Artie Part 2 Fight Breaks Out

Artie Part 3 Artie Quits

Summer 2008 Game 2 FSFC 1 Bulverde 0

2008-04-07T11:43:00.003-05:00

Sunday 4.6.08
Specht 12 11 am
FSFC vs Bulverde

That was the game I expected last week
Piece of shit overinflated blue padded ball didn't help
the following is the list of players that played well

Russ scores the game winning goal with 10 minutes left, after he secures the catch with complete control of the ball and two feet inbounds
FSFC 1 Bulverde 0
1 minute left Ken tries to give the game away by picking up the ball after Jacobs had played the ball setting up an indirect free kick at the 18
Ken giveth and ken taketh away as ken makes a dazzling diving save preserving the lead
Final FSFC 1 Bulverde 0

Goal of the Game: Rusty with the catch and shoot

Offensive MVP: Ken with the Assist

Defensive MVP: Ken with the diving save of the season

Asshole of the Game- Rusty- Trying to pretend that you threw in $20 at Specht road, when in fact Migjet gave you a $10 bill- Nice try Wasson

Lineup

GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB BerryBodo
ST Darilek
SW Kblische
HB Speetey
HB Tommy
CM Romo
CM Kneals
F #19
F Bobby

Bench
Migjet
Awhite
JP
Rusty

Summer 2008 Vids y Mas 2

2008-04-04T13:58:00.002-05:00

BerryMan and his Ketchup

I like to ride my bicycle

MigJet on Barbara Walters

MigJet at Spring Break

http://view.break.com/481365 - Watch more free videos

Dr. humer

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

Summer 2008 Game 1 Summary FSFC 5 Intl Old Boys 4

2008-03-30T20:09:00.004-05:00

Holy Shit We Played a Game

Game Summary

Who is the genius that put those fences up?
Is it really that hard to pay?
We have added 3 new players this summer, and b/c they have payed they will play
The Intl Old Boys don't like us
Best we have ever played after a 6 week layoff
TRex got home at 5:30 from pumping some FUGLY and made the game
FSFC give up the first goal after a turnover 1-0 OlBoys
Pblische ties it up with a free kick after the Moses parted the Wall 1-1
Kblische closes her eyes and missed a wide open header off the top of his head
Kblische makes up for it by crossing back post to Pblische for the header 2-1
The Old Boys take advantage of the left FB and HB pushing up leaving the entire left side of the field vacant. Easy goal 2-2
#19 gets called for a very questionable offsides negating a breakaway
Halftime 2-2
Fading Stars work the attack, Pblische passes(yes tis true) to Romo, Romo takes it to the six, bringing out the goalie and last defender and passes it back to Pblische for the tap in goal FSFC lead 3-2
Goal kick gets blasted down the field to Pblische who is left 1 V 3- Pblische easily beats the defenders and buries his shot side netting. Then he celebrates by rubbing his buddah belly FSFC 4 Old Boys 2
Unable to dominate defensively and get an easy clear leads to a chip in the box that gets flicked into the side net FSFC 4 Old Boys 3
Kblische wins a free kick about 35 yards out- Kblische blasts it into the box where #19 uses his stick to deflect the puck past the keeper FSFC 5 Old Boys 3
Common theme, porous defense somehow we give up another goal can't remember FSFC 5 Old Boys 4
Is this an MLS Game?
Trying to close out the game, Rusty wins the ball at midfield against the last defender, slides, kicks the ball forward behind the midfield stripe. #19 runs onto the ball with only the keeper to beat. Whistle blows. #19 glances at the linesman who has his flag down and is running- somehow the cocksucker ref claims offsides and places the ball 3 inches past the midfield stripe.
First time I have ever seen offsides called on your own half of the field.
FSFC 5 Old boys 4

Offensive MVP: Even though everyone voted for #19, we will go ahead and give it to Pblische

Defensive MVP: Not often does allowing 4 goals get you MVP, but outstanding game from the new goalie.

Quote of the Game: #19 when describing new player Bobby 2- He looks and plays just like Barnes except he doesn't have a belly and his tits are muscle.

Goat of the Game: Whoever put those stupid fences up

Goal of the Game: Teamwork- "Fading Stars work the attack, Pblische passes(yes tis true) to Romo, Romo takes it to the six, bringing out the goalie and last defender and passes it back to Pblische for the tap in goal FSFC lead 3-2

Goals: PBlische 4(4) #19 1(1)
Allowed: Greg 4(4)
Assists: Romo 1(1) Kblische 2(2) Greg 1(1)

Yellow Cards Kblische 1(1)

Lineup

GK Greg
FB Jacobs
FB Bergman
SW Kendall
ST Kblische
HB Tommy
HB Berardo
CM Romo
CM Kneals
F #19
F PBlische

Bench

Rusty
Awhite
MigJet
Bobby 2
TRex

Summer 2008 Vids Y Mas 1

2008-03-27T15:01:00.002-05:00

Who the hell is this guy and what the hell logo is that?

Nickelback steals music

How dirk hurt herself

I got my money on this guy fore the Masters

Streaking rocks

Good Night

Berryman Gets some

Caught Banging Blow Up Doll? - Watch more free videos

Holy Fuck Me in the Ass Batman

2008-03-21T15:10:00.003-05:00

UPDATED STANDINGS
SASA Spring 2008 Champions

Group A
1st Place The Machine
2nd Place RC Defenders

Group B
1st Place LAFB Warhawks
2nd Place Storm/Atl. Peru (tied)

Group C
1st Place Fading Stars
2nd Real Azteca/Havoc (tied)

Group D
1st Place Bulverde
2nd Place Blitzkrieg

Group E
1st Place under review
2nd Place under review

Group F
1st Place Trouble/Holland Co-ed (tied)
2nd Place Brew Crew Co-ed

Group G
1st Place Soccer World Plus Co-ed
2nd Place Family Jewels Co-ed

Spring 2008 Season Results and Awards

2008-02-25T14:41:00.007-06:00

Game 1 2-Dec SA Dynamo 4-2 W
Game 2 9-Dec Vanguard FC 4-3 W
Game 3 16-Dec Deportivo ? 1 - 2 L
Game 4 6-Jan SA Elite 3 - 1 W
Game 5 13-Jan Celtics 3 - 2 W
Game 6 20-Jan Global Stars 2- 3 L
Game 7 27-Jan Cucuy 2-1 W
Game 8 3-Feb FT Sam 3-3 T
Game 9 10-Feb Havoc 1 - 1 T
Game 10 17-Feb Atletico Celaya 3 - 4 L

5-3-2 17 pts Group C Champions

Goals- Assists-Points

Pblische 10-2-22
#19 3-4-10
Kblische 4-1-9
Rusty 2- 4- 8
Romo 2 - 5- 9
Sean 2 - 0- 4
Jihad 1 - 2- 4
Bobby 1 -1- 3
Darilek 0 - 1- 1
Bodo 0-1- 1
BerryBodo 0- 1- 1

Goals Allowed

Ken 21
Pblische 1

Games Played

#19 10
Ken 10
Pblische 10
Bergman 9
Kblische 9
Tommy 9
Romo 9
Jacobs 8
Jihad 7
Darilek 7
Berryman 7
Bodo 7
Rusty 6
Berardo 6
FnJ 6
Bobby 5
Kneals 2
Kendall 1
Sean 1
TRex 1
Barnes 1
Jeff 1
Adam 1

Awards

Game of the Season

The 300 Game

"My Child Has Perfect Attendence Bumper Sticker"

#19
Ken
Pblische

"Hacker of the Spring"

BerryBodo- 2 Yellows for tackles from behind

Goal of the Spring

#19- "Romo plays a ball to the corner that Rusty chases down- Rusty takes the ball to the endline and blisters a cross to the 7 -- #19 runs on to the ball lets it pass and inside heels the ball into the back of the net- Words cannot describe the beauty FSFC 2 Celtics 0"

Churchill Post of the Spring

Kblische- The ringer from 30 that came right back to him and then the follow up shank

Goldish Boot

Pblische- 10 Goals

Quote of the Spring

MigJet This is an actual conversation that happened at Hooters- The girl is wearing a nightie, and begins discussing her marijuana use

Migjet: "You know that Pot makes your Tits sag"
Carissa Looking puzzled and then Migjet stares right at her tits and says
Migjet: "Looks like you have been smoking too much Pot!"
Carissa: "Ohhh You are a DICK"

Offensive MVP

Pblische- 10 Goals 2 Assists 22 Points

Defensive MVP

Kblische- Only scored on Ken 1 time

Spring 2008 Game 10 FSFC 3 Atletico Celaya 4

2008-02-18T15:21:00.002-06:00

Here is the summary of this game

Lineup
GK Ken
FB Bergman
FB Berrymna
ST/SW PMJMD
CM Romo
CM #19
CM Bobby
F Rusty

Bench
Pblische
Sean
Coach Migjet

Goals Sean 2(2) Pblische 1(10)
Allowed Ken 4(21)

Yellow Cards: Berrybodo 1(2) #19 1(2)

Goal of the Game: #19 passes it to Romo, Romo chips it backside to Sean- Sean rips it top shelf

Goat of the Game: those of you that continue to choose not to play

Quote of the Game:

Foul of the Game: #19 with a clean tackle that destroys #8 ending up with a yellow card

Spring 2009 Game 9 FSFC 1 Havoc 1

2008-02-11T12:31:00.001-06:00

Game Summary

We have to wear red uniforms with lining
TRex makes his return
FnJ hurts his back in the first 5 minutes
Migjet Brings a fucking possum and beer
AWhite makes his return
Kneals makes his return
Jihad skips work-

1st Half

Ken makes a diving punch on a free kick- of course he could have just caught it and not dove
#19 gets a pass from Romo at the 18, chips the keeper and hits inside of the upper 90 and bounds out
Kblische has his man marked, Jacobs takes the guy down and the ball squirts to the other team and he buries a low shot on Ken
FSFC 0 Havoc 1
What kind of stupid fucking name is Havoc FC?- sounds like an air conditioning company
Game momentum switches to the FSFC after the goal
Pblische misses 2 goals
Jihad gets a steal, passes it to BerryBodo who decides his best option is to pass it to Pblische down the left side- Pblische rips it far post, off the keepers hand and in the net
FSFC 1 Havoc 1 Halftime

Nobody scores, we miss a bunch of opportunities

Final FSFC 1 Havoc 1

Goals Pblische 1(9)
Allowed Ken 1(17)

Yellow Cards: #19 1(1)

Quote of the Game 1: Migjet- While watching the coed game that follows our match, Migjet asks the blonde HB running down the field "Hey you wanna beer?"

Quota of the Game 2: Kneals- After the other team realizes they have been playing with 10 players for about 8 minutes the sub in a player- 1 minute later the FSFC score
Kneal: " Looks like you should have kept playing with 10"

Whack of the Game: Ken- sending jackie chan kung fu flying on a breakaway

Goal of the Game: Pblische- not a hard choice

Defensive MVP: Ken

Offensive MVP: Pblische

Sub of the Game: TRex

Lineup:

GK Ken
FB Tommy
FB Bergman
SW Kblische
ST Darilek
HB PMJMD
HB FnJ
CM Romo
CM Kneals
F #19
F Jihad

BENCH

Coach Migjet
TRex
Bodo
BerryBodo
Pblische
AWhite

Spring 2008 Vids 9

2008-02-08T13:04:00.000-06:00

Hammer Time

De Fuhr Returns

Cock Pit

Best Vid I have seen in a long time

Sick Soccer

Spring 2008 Game 8 FSFC 3 Army 3

2008-02-04T15:22:00.000-06:00

GAME SUMMARY

7 vs 11 is a great strategy to begin the game
Lolly gaging to the field is an even better strategy
Not being able to read and going to the wrong soccer complex- Brilliant Ken
Giving up a really soft goal when we finally get a full squad best idea yet
Army 1 FSFC 0
Pblische rips a breakaway off the post
FSFC get the equalizer minutes later as Romo grabs a ball on the end line, passes to Pblische who chips it across the goal face to Kblische's head
FSFC 1 Army 1
Kendall dribbles thru, gets 1v1 with the keeper and bumps it off the crossbar
Pblische gets the ball at the 18, holds it till Kblische runs thru putting Kblische 1v1 vs the keeper- Kblische cracks it off of the keeper and cleats his head. Ball richochets to Romo who deftly shins the ball into the net
FSFC 2 Army 1 Halftime
Bleeding Army goalie gives a stirring speech screaming drill seargent esque at the troops
Game goes back and forth with both teams getting opportunities
Army guy blasts one upper 90 easily beating Ken
FSFC 2 Army 2
Fading Stars continue to press- Tommy gets wacked earning a free kick just short of midfield. Kendall sends one deep that skips past the sweeper- #19 gets loose and the sweeper grabs the jersey and takes down #19 just outside the 18
Pblische steps over the free kick and Kblische unleashes a nasty strike that dips down at the last second under the crossbar. The keeper had zero chance
FSFC 3 Army 2
With the game in hand, the FSFC are controlling the pitch, clearing the attacks and even counter attacking.
With about a minute left, Kblische gives an easy ball to Romo- Romo whiffs the trap and and the Army counter attacks- the left foot only sweeper gets the ball and goes 1v1 with darilek and gets off a weak shot that beats Ken
FSFC 3 Army 3
Pblische gives it one more go and throws a cursing fit and gets the yellow
Final FSFC 3 Army 3

Goals: Kblische 2(4) Romo 1(2)
Allowed: Pblische 1(1) Ken 2(16)

Yellow Cards: Pblische 1(1)

Churchill Post of the Game: Pblische with another ringer and Kendall makes his return a glancing shot from the 6 off of the crossbar

Quote of the Game: Romo- to Kblische "I bitched at you two the whole game to pass me the ball and then I miss the trap"

Goal of the Game: Kblische: The fucking blast was blistered
Assholes of the Game: All of you that can't tell fucking time
Offensive MVP: Kblische
Defensive MVP: Pretty Weak- None

Lineup

GK Pblische
FB Bergman
FB FnJ
SW Jacobs
ST Darilek
CM #19
CM Jihad

Cocksuckers that can't tell time

Romo
Ken
Kblische
Berrybodo
Tommy
Bodo
Bobby
Rusty

Spring 2008 Vids Ocho

2008-02-01T13:12:00.000-06:00

The Halftime speech I will be giving this week

Monty Star Trek

I fucked Matt Damon

Tongue Girl

Chevy vs Pryor

Obama Part 2