Too many goals for a game summary, so lets watch the Trinity Miracle
Yellow Cards: Kneals 1(1)
Goals: Pblische 4(6) #19 1(3) Kblische 1(5)
Allowed: Ken 3(14)
Offensive MVP: Kneals- 3 assists and 1 yellow card- very solid game
Defensive MVP: Bodo- I think I saw him play defense, therefore he wins
Krazy Ken Wipeout of the Game: This time our cocksucker GK doesn't take out any of our players, just fucking hammers the kid that put his boot in his face- very nice
Foul of the Game- Tommy- in a bit of payback, Tommy cleans out the cocksmoker that whacked Kblische- kid has nothing to say, Tommy walks away- very nice
Goal of the Game- Kblische- Kneals brings it up the right half, #19 shows and Kneals hits him with the pass, #19 goes right back to Kneals streaking down the half- Kneals lays off a beauty to Kblische who takes it down to the 12 and rips a hole in the net with his angry blast
Churchill Post of the Game- Kblische- rocket shot from 35 out rings the bell like Rocky vs Apollo
Goat of the Game- #19 just like Sampson, all of the power left with the hair
Quote of the Game- FUCK ALL OF YOU- #19 GOT A FUCKING HAIRCUT- like #19 needs 18 people busting balls- too many quotes to put in here- however if you twink ass mofos hadn't come through as solidly as you did , #19 would have have been even more upset
Chase for the Goldish Boot: And down the stretch they come: Pblische dashes to the lead with a 4 goal outburst- Kblische is holding tight down 1 and Rusty is hoping for another one of his bunches of goals
Pblische 6 Kblische 5 Rusty 5
Lineup
GK Ken
FB BerryBodo
FB Bergman
SW Kendall
ST Darilect
HB Speetey
HB Rusty
CM Romosexual
CM Kblische
F #19
F Pblische
Bench
Migjet
Tommy
Bobby
Bodo
Kneals
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Fall 2007 Vids and sheet 9
Bud Light Men of Genius
Best Free Kick Evar!
New Video of Berryman Dancing
Safety Tips
Prank War 6
College Final Exam
Best Free Kick Evar!
New Video of Berryman Dancing
Safety Tips
Prank War 6
College Final Exam
Monday, October 15, 2007
Fall 2007 Game Ocho FSFC 1 Atletico Celaya 1INSTANT CLASSIC
Christy Ronaldo Dida
Game Summary
Multiple Yellow Cards, a Red Card, flops, deceptive slaps and a player running off with the game ball all lead to a Fading Stars FC instant classic and all time game.
In their infinite wisdom, the FSFC play their 2nd friendly during a 10 game season, despite the fact that their are 11 teams in the division. This time the FSFC get to play a team 2 divisions higher, have a coach and practice. Fortunately, for the FSFC there isn't a coach in the world that can keep Mexicans from dribbling Pblische style.
The game begins with some controversy as the Referee has one linesman that is 12 and that is it- he yells at us to leave him alone, and the kid will comply by not raising his flag the entire game. Also, the forward from Cialis tells his girlfriend to take off her shirt and give it to the goalie that is wearing a white t-shirt.
It becomes early that the star of the game is Christy Ronaldo Dida- the suave bastard child of a torrid anal love affair between Christian Ronaldo and Dida- his birth eventually coming b/c Ronaldo could only hold a terd in for so long b/c his asshole has been loosened by the gay cock. Fortuantely the kid now plays division 2 soccer b/c the couldn't make it in Menudo b/c they actually have to play with each other as well as dance like faggots on straight night at the Bonham.
Going into a stiff wind, the FSFC decide to let Christy dribble and dribble and dribble ultimately she would pass the ball and to midfield were nothing would happen.
Early on it is apparent that if you give the Cialis players time, they could dribble- if you bodied up and ran through the ball they were worthless. This strategy would pay off later.
Cialis wins a corner kick and clearly runs a play that they practice- The corner goes to the front of the 6 were an unmarked player heads it near post, beating BerryBodo who as of Monday still hasn't jumped to clear the ball.
We go to halftime
FSFC 0 Selenas 1
Just like when Yolanda Saldivar changed the course of musical history, it was only a matter of time before the FSFC jump back on the wagon.
Playing with a big wind, the FSFC come out pressing- The game becomes dominated by the FSFC defense and midfield and the dribbling by the Selenas becomes a detriment.
Only problem with the game is that the ref decides that everyone needs a yellow card-
Finally about 15 minutes in #19 receives a pass at the 12, drops it back to Kblisce at the 18, Kblische and his svelte figure dances around the defender and blasts a screamer that never leaves the ground(PK lesson learned) and easily beats the keeper
FSFC 1 Selena's Dead 1
No more goals are scored and the game ends 1-1, Here is where the game becomes an all time classic
With 12 minutes left, #19 is fixing to sub out for a quick rest and then finish the final 7 or so- #19 is chasing down a bad pass by the Cialis defender and has the pleasure of once again pressuring Christy Ro Dida- #19 has no chance of stealing the ball and instead of fouling, slides on his knees to avoid contact. Christy Ro Dida continues at full speed for 2 steps then starts hopping like he was shot and eventually falls to his death 8 yards away. Christy Ron Dida rolls around like she had been fucked by Jihads WMD- The ref actually buys this cavernous assholes routine-
Sadly, #19 receives a 2nd Yellow and gasp a Red Card
#19 displays his profound vocabulary, clearly showing why he scored 800 on the SAT(math score included)- in front of the 10 year old girls soccer team waiting to play.
Fast forward 5 minutes
Christy Ronaldo Dida decides that she is going to save the day and actually cross midfield and try her dribbling bullshit against the defense- Kendall and the rest of the boys are visibly aroused at the opportunity to hammer this bitch like big haired patron whores at a concert at Sneakers
What Christy didn't know is that 1. AWhite played in the Mexican league 2. AWhite speak a da spanish 3. AWhite had no intention of chasing after her
Christy attacks AWhite who gently nudges her to the ground where she begins to roll around like the Preacher daughter whore in her red boots that Daddy hates in Footloose. Only this time Kevin Bacon wasn't there to dance with her.
While rolling on the ground, Christy says in spanish "You are gone too!"
Awhite positions himself between the ref and Christy, with his left hand, AWhite gently pats Christy Ronaldo Dida on the back asking "Are You OK?" whilst his ride hand is deftly slapping her in the face.
The ref awards AWhite with only yellow card, and Christy becomes outraged. Christy grabs the ball and starts running off the field- She keeps going and runs all the way to Carlo's double wide- disapearing for 5 minutes- When she returns, she is greeted by Jacobs on the sideline who is taunting her by imitating a crying baby.
Christy steals the game ball, runs off the field, delays the game 5 minutes and what does the ref do? He gives him a yellow card and lets him take a free kick from the 25-
Fucking Epic
Goals: Kblisce 1(4)
Allowed: Ken 1(11)
Cards
Yellow: #19 2(2) PMJMD 1(1) BobbyEwing 1(1) AWhite 1(1) Kendall 1(1)
Reds: #19 1(1)
Quote of the Game: AWhite- "Are you ok?" while patting Christy Ronaldo Dida on the back with his left hand and slapping him in the face with his right hand
Goal of the Game: Kblische- #19 drops the ball to Kblische at the top of the 18, Kblische quickly beats the defender and learns the lesson from last week and keeps the ball on the ground
Offensive MVP: Kblische- he scored on a blast
Defensive MVP: AWhite- while his play wasn't dominating, his slapping the cuntboy wins hands down
Foul of the Game: #19- what a hard wack he layed on Christy Ronaldo Dida- almost actually touched a pussy for the first time since the he got married
Churchill Post of the Game- None, but we hit 5 posts during warmup for the 2nd week in a row
Hooters MVP: Tom Wasson- contributed $19 to the tab even though he ate $12 worth of wings and drank $15 worth of beer. baby steps
Ken Krush of the Game: New award for the player on our own team that Ken knocks the shit out of- Better to be the hammer than the nail- This weeks winner Kendall
Lineup
GK Ken
FB BerryBodo
FB Birdman
SW Kendall
ST Darilect
HB Berardo
HB Jacobs
CM Romo
CM Kblische
F #19
F Pblische
Bench and Staff
Coach Migjet
Head Pisser and Moaner Wasson
Jihad
Bodo
Bobby
AWhite
Game Summary
Multiple Yellow Cards, a Red Card, flops, deceptive slaps and a player running off with the game ball all lead to a Fading Stars FC instant classic and all time game.
In their infinite wisdom, the FSFC play their 2nd friendly during a 10 game season, despite the fact that their are 11 teams in the division. This time the FSFC get to play a team 2 divisions higher, have a coach and practice. Fortunately, for the FSFC there isn't a coach in the world that can keep Mexicans from dribbling Pblische style.
The game begins with some controversy as the Referee has one linesman that is 12 and that is it- he yells at us to leave him alone, and the kid will comply by not raising his flag the entire game. Also, the forward from Cialis tells his girlfriend to take off her shirt and give it to the goalie that is wearing a white t-shirt.
It becomes early that the star of the game is Christy Ronaldo Dida- the suave bastard child of a torrid anal love affair between Christian Ronaldo and Dida- his birth eventually coming b/c Ronaldo could only hold a terd in for so long b/c his asshole has been loosened by the gay cock. Fortuantely the kid now plays division 2 soccer b/c the couldn't make it in Menudo b/c they actually have to play with each other as well as dance like faggots on straight night at the Bonham.
Going into a stiff wind, the FSFC decide to let Christy dribble and dribble and dribble ultimately she would pass the ball and to midfield were nothing would happen.
Early on it is apparent that if you give the Cialis players time, they could dribble- if you bodied up and ran through the ball they were worthless. This strategy would pay off later.
Cialis wins a corner kick and clearly runs a play that they practice- The corner goes to the front of the 6 were an unmarked player heads it near post, beating BerryBodo who as of Monday still hasn't jumped to clear the ball.
We go to halftime
FSFC 0 Selenas 1
Just like when Yolanda Saldivar changed the course of musical history, it was only a matter of time before the FSFC jump back on the wagon.
Playing with a big wind, the FSFC come out pressing- The game becomes dominated by the FSFC defense and midfield and the dribbling by the Selenas becomes a detriment.
Only problem with the game is that the ref decides that everyone needs a yellow card-
Finally about 15 minutes in #19 receives a pass at the 12, drops it back to Kblisce at the 18, Kblische and his svelte figure dances around the defender and blasts a screamer that never leaves the ground(PK lesson learned) and easily beats the keeper
FSFC 1 Selena's Dead 1
No more goals are scored and the game ends 1-1, Here is where the game becomes an all time classic
With 12 minutes left, #19 is fixing to sub out for a quick rest and then finish the final 7 or so- #19 is chasing down a bad pass by the Cialis defender and has the pleasure of once again pressuring Christy Ro Dida- #19 has no chance of stealing the ball and instead of fouling, slides on his knees to avoid contact. Christy Ro Dida continues at full speed for 2 steps then starts hopping like he was shot and eventually falls to his death 8 yards away. Christy Ron Dida rolls around like she had been fucked by Jihads WMD- The ref actually buys this cavernous assholes routine-
Sadly, #19 receives a 2nd Yellow and gasp a Red Card
#19 displays his profound vocabulary, clearly showing why he scored 800 on the SAT(math score included)- in front of the 10 year old girls soccer team waiting to play.
Fast forward 5 minutes
Christy Ronaldo Dida decides that she is going to save the day and actually cross midfield and try her dribbling bullshit against the defense- Kendall and the rest of the boys are visibly aroused at the opportunity to hammer this bitch like big haired patron whores at a concert at Sneakers
What Christy didn't know is that 1. AWhite played in the Mexican league 2. AWhite speak a da spanish 3. AWhite had no intention of chasing after her
Christy attacks AWhite who gently nudges her to the ground where she begins to roll around like the Preacher daughter whore in her red boots that Daddy hates in Footloose. Only this time Kevin Bacon wasn't there to dance with her.
While rolling on the ground, Christy says in spanish "You are gone too!"
Awhite positions himself between the ref and Christy, with his left hand, AWhite gently pats Christy Ronaldo Dida on the back asking "Are You OK?" whilst his ride hand is deftly slapping her in the face.
The ref awards AWhite with only yellow card, and Christy becomes outraged. Christy grabs the ball and starts running off the field- She keeps going and runs all the way to Carlo's double wide- disapearing for 5 minutes- When she returns, she is greeted by Jacobs on the sideline who is taunting her by imitating a crying baby.
Christy steals the game ball, runs off the field, delays the game 5 minutes and what does the ref do? He gives him a yellow card and lets him take a free kick from the 25-
Fucking Epic
Goals: Kblisce 1(4)
Allowed: Ken 1(11)
Cards
Yellow: #19 2(2) PMJMD 1(1) BobbyEwing 1(1) AWhite 1(1) Kendall 1(1)
Reds: #19 1(1)
Quote of the Game: AWhite- "Are you ok?" while patting Christy Ronaldo Dida on the back with his left hand and slapping him in the face with his right hand
Goal of the Game: Kblische- #19 drops the ball to Kblische at the top of the 18, Kblische quickly beats the defender and learns the lesson from last week and keeps the ball on the ground
Offensive MVP: Kblische- he scored on a blast
Defensive MVP: AWhite- while his play wasn't dominating, his slapping the cuntboy wins hands down
Foul of the Game: #19- what a hard wack he layed on Christy Ronaldo Dida- almost actually touched a pussy for the first time since the he got married
Churchill Post of the Game- None, but we hit 5 posts during warmup for the 2nd week in a row
Hooters MVP: Tom Wasson- contributed $19 to the tab even though he ate $12 worth of wings and drank $15 worth of beer. baby steps
Ken Krush of the Game: New award for the player on our own team that Ken knocks the shit out of- Better to be the hammer than the nail- This weeks winner Kendall
Lineup
GK Ken
FB BerryBodo
FB Birdman
SW Kendall
ST Darilect
HB Berardo
HB Jacobs
CM Romo
CM Kblische
F #19
F Pblische
Bench and Staff
Coach Migjet
Head Pisser and Moaner Wasson
Jihad
Bodo
Bobby
AWhite
Friday, October 12, 2007
Fall 2007 Vids and sheet Ocho
Possible the greatest scene in TV history
The Perfect Girl
Song For The Perfect Girlfriend - Watch more free videos
The Phantom Pooper
Ned Calls the 700 Club
Ace and Gary Save Xmas
Commercials
Prank War 5
The Perfect Girl
Song For The Perfect Girlfriend - Watch more free videos
The Phantom Pooper
Ned Calls the 700 Club
Ace and Gary Save Xmas
Commercials
Prank War 5
Monday, October 08, 2007
Fall 2007 Game 7 FSFC 3 Johnny Rooks 0
Lunch n Learn,
Once a Very Common Bird
The Johnny Rook, or Striated Caracara Phalcoboenus australis, has been recognised as a very unusual bird of prey in the Falklands for two centuries. Charles Darwin visited Port Louis, East Falkland, in autumn 1833 and 1834. He was one of the first to report on the Johnny Rook's behaviour and wrote that it was 'exceedingly numerous', 'constantly haunted the neighbourhood of houses to pick up all kinds of offal', was 'extraordinarily tame and fearless' and 'very mischievous and inquisitive, quarrelsome and passionate'. Sheep were introduced and farming developed from about 1850 on East Falkland and 1867 on West Falkland. From February 1858 to December 1860, Captain Abbott of the Falkland Islands Detachment of Royal Marines travelled widely on East Falkland. His account (Woods & Woods 1997) of the Johnny Rook began with the statement, 'This is one of the commonest birds in East Falkland.' Abbott recorded that he visited North Camp (East Falkland) in December 1860 and, 'found at least 15 nests along the cliffs'.
GAME SUMMARY
The Johnny Rooks, pain in the asses making us play at 3pm and ruining the Football games and time well spent with a real bird, the Hooters Owl
First half, the defense pretty much sets the tone that the Rooks ain't good enough to score. Giving up long shots that were easily wide or saved. The offense gets off to a smooth start generating many opportunities that turn in to near misses.
Finally Bobby brings it down the right half and crosses to FnJ at the 12 who hits the shot right at the keeper and it goes right threw his hands and legs.
Plenty of other opportunities continue, and Kblische draws a PK with minutes left in the half
Kblische lines up facing against the 5'5" keeper- The keeper goes left, Kblische goes right, Scott Norwood right- 15 feet too high and 5 yards too wide
FSFC 1 Rooks 0 HALFTIME
The 2nd half begins much the same, except the FSFC work the ball from the back left all the way to the top right half of the 18, a cross to the middle and a missed shot- oh well we tried to play good soccer. Then the Rooks start trying to win- They attack the left side of the defense and actually start ripping some shots with some rebounds and earn a couple of corner kicks.
Ken knocks down the guy with the captain band and Kendall tells him to shut the Fuck up and the game is finally under control
#19 sets up FnJ with a breakaway he is unable to connect on. Kblische gets free after beating a couple of guys and shoots high and to the right- Bobby rips one from the 18 right to the keeper, #19 sets up Kneals with shot inside the 15 he hits wide left-
FSFC controlled the game but the game had the feel that a cheap goal was coming for the Rooks
Finally, the Rooks make another mistake and Rusty gets the ball at the 18 and buries his shot side netting easily beating the keeper
FSFC 2 Rooks 0
With the game pretty much locked up, Rusty steals the ball from their star player- #19 gets the ball attacks the defender and lays off a pass to a streaking Rusty- Rusty beats the keeper and the much faster player to the ball and taps it in for the game winner
FSFC 3 Rooks 0
GOALS: FnJ 1(1) Rusty 2(5)
Allowed: 0 2 straight shutouts
Cards: This is fucking sad- 7 games and no yellow cards
Gout of the Game: Gotta go with FnJ's record setting Gout Goal
Quotes of the Game: When a group of 15- 50 year old women walk into Hooters this exchange occurs- #19 "Holy the shit the waters are chummed here at El Jarro South" Awhite "someone call Migjet and get his arse down here" while #19 is on the phone with Migjet informing him of the chummed waters- Romo says "tell him to hurry as one of them just had a hot flash"
Churchill Post of the Game- 6 in warmup none in the game
Goat of the Game: Kblische- hate to say it but the PK was off by just enough to earn you this great honor
John Birdman Handball of the Week: The Birdman strikes again with his 3rd straight handball in the box- this one wasn't called
Foul of the Game: Ken- Damn, it is like we have Barnes in goal
Chase for the Goldish Boot: With 3 Games left Rusty has taken a commanding lead with 5, Kblische trails with 3 and can't seem to find the net.
Offensive MVP: Rusty- 2 more goals
Defensive MVP: Kendall- 2 shutouts in a row
Lineup
GK Krazy Ken
FB BerryBodo
FB Birdman
SW Kendall
ST Darilect
HB FnJ
HB Bobby
CM Kneals
CM Kblische
F #19
F Rusty
Bench
Bodo
Speetey
AWhite
Friday, October 05, 2007
Fall 2007 Weekly Links and Vids 7
Dida sets soccer back 50 years
My new plan
Gay Duo Read Fan Mail
Mascot Piles on
Ned phones the cops
Prank War 4
My new plan
Gay Duo Read Fan Mail
Mascot Piles on
Ned phones the cops
Prank War 4
Monday, October 01, 2007
Fall 2007 Game 6 Traditionals 0 FSFC 1
11 players-
no subs
1 goal- the end
Hack of the year- Ken- skinny forward decides to challenge Ken for a ball in the air, skinny forward leaves the game with a concussion and partially dislocated shoulder.
Goal of the Game- Kblische- Kblische passes to #19 who beats the defender lays off the ball to Kblische at the 18 who rips a shot passed the keeper
Goal Kblische 1(3)
Allowed NONE
Lineup
GK Ken
FB Tommy
FB BerryBodo
SW Kendall
ST Kneals
HB Birdman
HB FnJ
CM Romo
CM Kblische
F #19
F Rusty
Bench
NONE
no subs
1 goal- the end
Hack of the year- Ken- skinny forward decides to challenge Ken for a ball in the air, skinny forward leaves the game with a concussion and partially dislocated shoulder.
Goal of the Game- Kblische- Kblische passes to #19 who beats the defender lays off the ball to Kblische at the 18 who rips a shot passed the keeper
Goal Kblische 1(3)
Allowed NONE
Lineup
GK Ken
FB Tommy
FB BerryBodo
SW Kendall
ST Kneals
HB Birdman
HB FnJ
CM Romo
CM Kblische
F #19
F Rusty
Bench
NONE
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